Nightmares of Somalia
by FireToTheRain06
Summary: Tony goes over to Ziva's apartment to surprise her with pizza and a movie, but what he overhears when he gets there, is something he won't soon forget. Somalia based story with mentions of torture, PTSD and possible rape. Story now complete. Will be starting a sequel.
1. Chapter 1

**Nightmares of Somalia**

**Summary: **Tony goes over to Ziva's apartment to surprise her with pizza and a movie, but what he overhears when he gets there, is something he won't soon forget.

**Hurt/Comfort-Friendship**

**A/N: **I know, I know a lot of stories have been written about this. But, I thought I'd start it off and see what people thought. I basically got nothing on my other story, so I'm not wasting my time on this.

**Disclaimer: **Disclaimed!

* * *

Ziva was curled up in the fetal position on her couch. She had her SIG wrapped so tightly in her hand that it would probably take both Gibbs and Tony to pry it from her. The voice were loud inside her head and she somehow managed to point the gun outward.

Tony pulled up to her apartment just as she started screaming.

"No, I will never tell you! Get off of me."

His eyes went wide with fear and he pulled out his gun. "Ziva, I'm coming in." He yelled.

Just as he was about to kick in the door her gun went off and he pulled back. He managed to put his head around the door to see what was going on. Ziva was quiet, which wasn't a good sign. But, he never heard another person either. Slowly, making his way inside her apartment he saw Ziva on her couch shaking uncontrollably. The gun in her hand, had discharged and hit the wall. Tony carefully took it from her and placed it on a nearby table but not before removing the magazine and putting that in his own jacket pocket.

"Zi, wake up. Come on sweet heart, you're okay." Tony's voice echoed through her ears.

Ziva's eyes popped open and she just starred at him for what seemed like hours.

"Tony? What are you doing here?"

"I brought over pizza and a movie, but when I got here I thought you were in trouble." He said simply.

She looked at him confused. "What kind of trouble?"

Tony had a look on his face that she had never seen before. He was really worried. "I thought you were being attacked. And, then your gun went off and I didn't know what to think. You had started screaming when I walked up and I yelled back that I was coming in," Tony watches Ziva hang her head in shame.

"What's going on Zi? You know that you can tell me. You're not just my partner, you're my friend and I want you to be able to trust me."

All she could do was stifle back her tears. He took her hand in his. She looked up at him and started to speak.

"I trust you and I will tell you. It is just going to take some time."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

**A/N: **So, the rating might go up a bit as the story goes on but for right now I think T is good. Thank you to Foreign Music Lyrics for telling me while yes, this storyline has been done thousands of times it's basically okay to do it again :). And, thank you for all of the alerts, follows and reviews. Here is another chapter.

* * *

Ziva moved from her spot on the couch and Tony helped her up.

"Let me get you some water, okay?"

She nodded. "Do you mind if I change?"

"No, of course not. Do you mind if I stay for a little bit?" His voice quiet and soft.

She shook her head. "I never mind Tony." She spoke barely above a whisper.

Ziva walked towards her room and he watched her for a moment before retreating to her kitchen. He quickly made a call and knew he wouldn't have much time.

"DiNozzo, what's up?" Gibbs barked.

"Sorry boss, I don't mean to bother you..."

Gibbs could tell by his voice that something was wrong. "Tony, what's wrong?"

"It's Ziva, I don't even know where to start but I don't think it's good boss."

"Do you need me there?"

"Long story short, I came over to her place for pizza and a movie and she was screaming and her gun discharged. I thought she was being attacked. There was no one here and she was in a pure state of shock."

"She doesn't remember it?"

"No, but she's going to talk to me. I'm going to stay for a bit, and maybe stay the night on the couch once she goes into her room. I took her clip from her gun."

"Stay with her and keep me posted. I don't give a damn what time it is!" He said half yelling. "Sorry, you know we all love her."

"Yeah, I know, believe me I know."

Tony got Ziva her water and went back into the living room. She still wasn't there. He decided to go check on her.

"Zi, are you okay?" He called out through the crack of her bedroom door.

She didn't answer but he saw her sitting on the bed in some sweats and a bra that she hadn't yet taken off. He felt like he was invading her privacy. As much as he loved her in that way he would never take advantage of her ever. Her head was down and then she picked it up and looked at him.

"You can come in Tony."

He opened the door slowly. "Zi, what's going on in that beautiful head of yours?" He asked as he sat with his back to hers.

She looked up at him, her sad brown eyes meeting his soft green ones. "Don't you want to look at me?"

"I don't want you to feel as though I'm taking advantage of the situation. You're not just my partner Ziva, you're my best friend and I want to help you."

"Thank you for that Tony, that means a lot. I feel the same way."

"Do you want to put something on?"

"Hmm, oh sure. I guess I should do that." Ziva took off her bra and put on the short sleeve shirt that was sitting next to her.

"Ziva, do you want to talk?"

She got up from the bed. "Yes, let's go out into the living room though."

Tony nodded and followed her lead. She sat down and drank some of her water. "Can I make you something to eat?" He asked.

She gave him a small laugh. "This is my apartment you know."

"Yes, but I know where all your stuff is and you're so thin Ziva. I'm worried about you. I..." He couldn't he begin to explain how he felt.

"No, I'm fine Tony. But, thank you," She said giving him another small smile. "You wanted to talk, yes?"

"Yes, I want to know what's bothering you. What's going on with you."

She sighed. She knew she couldn't get away with telling him it was nothing because well, it wasn't nothing.

"I'm having nightmares about Somalia."

**A/N: **So, here is another chapter and it's a bit longer. I might put up another, who knows.


	3. Chapter 3

**3**

**A/N: **Wow, the reviews, followers, everything has been amazing! I don't even know what I all have planned for this story yet. I'm not sure what you want, so please let me know. Would you like Tony and Ziva to eventually get together? I have it as a friendship story for right now but, I'm thinking some of you are TIVA fans? I have no problem with TIVA friendship, but heck its been all friendship on the show. So, kind of angsty in this chapter!

* * *

Tony furrowed his brow and looked at her. He moved closer to her. She looked up at him and saw the look on his face. He looked frightened. She wondered if what she was about to tell him would scare him off.

_I guess I'll find out._ _She thought to herself. _

"Zi?"

"Saleem and his men would come in the room where I was being held and ask me questions. At first it was just beatings, which I could take and then the more I held out the more they would give me. And, then finally one day Saleem left for a moment and three of the men that were in the room took their turn with me."

Tony knew deep down that they had done something to her, but Ziva hadn't yet shared that with him yet. They had been home for about three months and his best friend and partner was suffering from these horrible nightmares.

Ziva wondered why he wasn't saying anything and then looked up at him and realized he was crying.

"I, Zi- I should have come sooner. I'll never forgive myself for what they did to you."

"Tony, I could never blame you for what happened to me."

He sighed. "Ziva, I was the reason you stayed in Israel and didn't come back here to begin with. I killed Michael."

"Yes, you killed Michael in self-defense and you did it for me. You had my back, you've always had it and I know that you always will."

His thumb went over his hand. "That I will." He said giving her a small smile. "Do you remember anything from your most recent dream, you know when your gun discharged?"

She nodded. "I do. I told you I didn't, but I lied. I guess I was embarrassed that I almost killed you. I'm sorry about that by the way."

"I was outside luckily and it hit the wall. I did take your clip though."

She looked at him, her brow furrowed.

"I was worried, I am still. I told Gibbs about it. I didn't know what was going on."

"I know, I understand. As for what I was dreaming about, Saleem wanted information about NCIS and he wanted to know all about Gibbs in particular. But, I wouldn't tell him anything so he raped me."

"God Ziva, you have to tell Gibbs."

"No, Gibbs can never know what happened."

"Ziva, you do trust him right?"

"Yes, more than anything. But, he doesn't need to know that I was assaulted because I didn't give Saleem information on him. I mean does it really matter? Besides, my nightmares will go away eventually Tony."

Tony got up almost angrily and walked into Ziva's kitchen. Ziva looked back up at him and saw him sitting at her kitchen table. He got up after a few minutes and came back in and spoke.

"You need to tell him. Am I the only one that gives a damn that you were hurt...NO that you were raped over there by those monsters? I mean, geez Ziva, over and over and over again! Please tell me that it bothers you? Because, it bothers the living hell out of me."

"Then get out Tony! I don't need you here."

"No, Ziva please don't say that. Come on, I know that you need me here."

"Go, I'll be just fine without you." Ziva said opening the door for him.

He took his jacket and removed the rest of the bullets from her gun. He wasn't taking any chances. He called Gibbs to let him know what had happened.

All Gibbs could do was grumble. "Go back to her place in the morning and make it right. I'll be okay without you for the day."

"Rule number 6 boss?"

"Yeah, I know Tony. Don't worry about it. Just make it right tomorrow."

"I will." He said before hanging up.

Tony couldn't sleep at all that night. All he could think of was Ziva and whether or not she was having a nightmare and what it might be about. He didn't mean for what he said to come out so harshly. He cared about her. He wished that Saleem could come back to life so that he could kill him, himself. Maybe, just maybe he was falling in love with Ziva didn't know it.

**A/N: **So, obviously I added things in here that weren't in the Somalia storyline. I just didn't want anyone to review and say 'hey, that never happened' lol! Yes, I know some of the stuff I added was just for fun. Besides, it's fiction right?


	4. Chapter 4

**4**

**A/N: **Not as many reviews as I had hoped for, but that's alright. As for the one of the Guest reviews I got- I work a full time job and by the time I get home at night, I'm so tired and I have just enough energy to eat a little something and usually go to bed. I promise that I'll try to work on longer chapters for the future.

* * *

Tony turned on his TV just to have some background noise, but all he did was stare at his ceiling. The truth is when Ziva was sitting on her bed he saw her chest. She had wounds like he had never imagined. Her back had been whipped with some sort of belt and one of the cuts she had started at her belly button and just continued down. His stomach woke him from his deep thoughts as it rumbled loudly. He realized that a tear had slipped down his cheek in that time.

Getting up he went into the kitchen and made himself a grilled cheese. "I have to make things right." He said as he took a drink of his water. His phone buzzed and he went to get it.

It was Ziva. He answered it. "Zi?"

All he could hear was screaming. "Ziva, it's Tony. I'm on my way to you. You're going to be okay."

"Get off of me." She screamed.

Tony raced over to her place as fast as he could. "Ziva, stay with me. I'm almost there. I won't leave you this time."

He parked his car, still on the phone with her. He opened her door and went in slowly. She was crying now. That was all he heard. He put his phone down and went into her bedroom. He sat down beside her and placed his hand on her back.

"No, you will not hurt them."

"Shh, Ziva. I'm here, it's Tony. No one is going to hurt anyone, I promise." He said trying to calm her.

"Tony?" She mumbled.

"Yeah, I'm here."

"Why did you come back? I mean I wasn't nice to you at all."

"Oh, I had a gut feeling that you needed me."

Ziva looked at him sitting up. "I'm sorry I threw you out. And, yes it does bother the hell out of me that I was raped." She said, her voice getting choked up.

Tony sighed. "I know Ziva. I'm sorry I got upset." He replied kissing the top of her head.

"Tony, are the nightmares ever going to end?"

"They will eventually, but I know that it will take time. I also know that you can count on me to be there with you every step of the way."

She looked at him and gave him a genuine smile. "Thank you for coming back Tony. I know that I didn't deserve it."

"Zi, please don't say that. And, don't ever say that you don't want to be here because I'm not sure what I'd do without you."

Tears streamed down her face. "They consume me Tony and I'm so afraid that I'll never come back from it. Besides, you would move on. You have before."

Tony kind of cocked his head to the side. "I take it your talking about your nightmares, which I said I would be here for. As, for moving on when and if you're not here, it would never happen Ziva. I didn't get over when you were missing for three months." As, he got up off the bed, he could hear her getting upset. "No, Ziva, please don't get upset. I didn't bring this up to get you upset. But, all I thought about was you. And, yes Ziva if you were gone and out of my life for good, I'm not sure that I could go on. I mean really, how would I be able to?"

"I really mean that much to you?"

"Yes, you really mean that much to me. I don't think anyone else ever will."

"What exactly are you saying Tony?"

"I'm saying that, well, I love you Ziva. That's what I'm saying."

"Tony, I'm damaged goods. You shouldn't love me."

He turned her face to look at him, moving a stray strand of hair away from her face. "But, you're not Ziva. And, you can't help who you fall in love with. I am in love with you, very much so. I have been for a long time now." He kissed her temple. "You, don't have to say it back if you're not ready and if you don't love me, I understand. But, just know that I'll always love you."

She got up, not saying anything and went into her bathroom and locked the door. He placed his head against the door as he listened to the running water.

_It was all too soon. You messed up again DiNozzo. Well, you're not leaving this time, at least she didn't kick you out. _

**A/N: **Not happy with this chapter. Anyways, off to work. Won't be back until later on this evening. I'll probably start a chapter but won't update until tomorrow or Friday.


	5. Chapter 5

**5**

**A/N: **I'm going to try my best at this chapter. For those who reviewed my Author's note and want to review this actual chapter-just PM me. If you really wonder if the 'Guest' reviewer was right in saying I should do research.

* * *

Tony could hear water running on the other side of the door. It sounded like she was maybe going to take a bath, but he wasn't quite sure.

"Ziva, how are you doing in there? Are you okay?"

"You can't love me, I'm no good for you." She responded.

He put his hand on the door. "Oh, but you are. Can I come in?"

"Okay, you can come in." She called out.

The door was still locked and he knew that. He also knew how to pick a lock. He took out a knife and opened it. When he entered the bathroom, he did not expect to see what he did in front of him.

"Oh, geez Ziva!"

Ziva was under water in her clothes. He took her out and raced put her onto the bed immediately. She started to cough and shiver. Slowly, he removed her wet clothes and dried off her body.

"Why? Why would you do this Ziva?"

She looked up at him. "What did I do?"

"You tried to drown yourself. If I hadn't been here, you would have been successful."

"Then why the hell did you come back? Maybe, just maybe I wanted to die!"She stammered.

"Well, maybe I didn't want you too and maybe the rest of your family didn't want you to either. Did you think about them? Or, maybe you're just being to damn selfish and just thinking about yourself!" Tony said yelling back.

He got up and went and got her some dry clothes. Turning back around to hand them to her she was in a silent uncontrollable sob. She nodded. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry Tony, but you're right I am being selfish. I can't help it, I'm scared."

"Ziva, that's why you have me. You don't want me to love you, yet I do. I'm not going to stop. I can't. I told you that you don't have to say it back. I'm okay with that. You can't help who you fall in love with. I've been in love with you since you walked into my life that very first day. I guess, I guess it just took this long for me to realize it."

"What about all my problems?"

"Ziva, I'm here for you through thick and thin. In good time and in bad. This post traumatic stress that you're facing, your don't have to face it alone. You have me, heck you have all of your family. And, that we all love you very much, not just me.

Ziva had finished putting her dry clothes on and smiled at him. "Thank you Tony. Will you stay with me the rest of the night?"

"I would like that very much." He said smiling.

**A/N: **Man, I had problems with this chapter because of being told my writing doesn't flow and that I don't know about PTSD. Yes, still laughing. Will put up a much longer chapter sometime tomorrow.


	6. Chapter 6

**6**

**A/N: **I don't even know how to start this chapter. The harsh reviews put me so down, and it's like how do I even begin? I will try, I promise.

* * *

Tony made some tea for Ziva as she sat on the couch. He joined her a few minutes later, placing the hot mug on the table in front of her.

"Zi, I'm going to back off for now. And, I want you to tell me when you're ready."

"You've stopped loving me already?" She asked suddenly.

"What? Oh, no, that's not it at all. I just meant I'm not going to push a relationship or anything on you. I'll always love you. My love for you Ziva David, it will never end."

"Good, because I love you too Anthony DiNozzo."

He looked at her kind of surprised. "What?"

"Nothing, I guess I just didn't expect to hear you say it so soon."

She looked down for a moment and then back up at him. "I know what I'm suffering from, but I'm not incapable of love. And, there might be moments that get really bad and I want to make sure that we'll be okay. I need to make sure of that, even if when those moments get bad I don't remember this conversation."

He kissed her temple softly. "I promise you Ziva. That's why, I think I should stay here or maybe you should stay with me a few days a week. Let's see how it goes. I don't want you alone, I do know that."

"Thank you Tony."

He gave her a smile. "Oh, and Ziva, I know that you're not incapable of love. I know that love everyone around you."

She kissed his cheek. He moved his face just a little and their lips met and they kissed. It was a simple kiss, yet it was so perfect. He was perfect in every way. She pulled away, her hand in his and she smiled at him.

"I love you Tony." She said again, this time with no hesitation.

He took her into his arms and she placed her head on his chest. The tea was forgotten about, but their love was anew. And, to them that was more important. Her first thought was what they would tell Gibbs.

"Zi, I know what you're thinking and he pretty much knows how I feel. I don't think he's going to stop anything."

"Rule 12 Tony." She whispered.

He looked down at her, her eyes closed. "Mm, I know. But, he knows that he can't stand in the way of love. Not real love anyways."

She opened her eyes to look at him. "So, we're really going to try an make this work? Are we going to consider ourselves boyfriend and girlfriend?"

Tony chuckled. "So cliché sounding isn't it?"

Ziva laughed. "Yes, it kind of is. But, well what else would we call ourselves? I mean lovers?"

Tony nearly choked. "Well, we're not that far yet. How about just us. You know, Tony and Zi."

She smiled. "I like that. And, when you introduce me to someone I don't know, will you say I'm your girlfriend?"

"Always, because that's what you are."

She placed her hand on his chest and closed her eyes again. "Can we go to sleep now? I'm pretty tired."

"Yeah, I think that's a really good idea. Do you want me to tuck you in?"

She shook her head. "No, I want you to sleep with me. Or, next to me." She said blushing. "Sorry."

"It's okay Ziva. I know we're not at that point yet. And, whenever we do reach that point is okay. I'm in no rush."

She took his hand and they went back to the bedroom. He watched as she crawled under the covers and then he took his spot on top of the bed.

"Goodnight Tony." She said as her head went down on his chest.

"Goodnight, beautiful." He said as he started to massage her head gently.

She was asleep within seconds. Ziva had no nightmares the rest of the night. Tony finally fell asleep after about forty-five minutes. He was rather jumpy, thinking that she might wake up. But, then after a half hour he finally convinced himself that she wasn't going to wake and that she was actually in a deep and peaceful sleep.

He managed to pry himself from her arms so that he could go use the bathroom and make a phone call.

"DiNozzo, are you back at Ziva's already?"

"Yeah, long story boss and I'll fill you in on it all when I have time. But, the short of it, is we're, well Ziva and I are together."

"Let me get this straight, Ziva went from throwing you out to you two being an item?"

"After I called you, I was lying on my couch and I couldn't sleep. She called me boss and didn't even know. She was having a nightmare and was screaming. I found her curled up on her bed. And, after I talked her down from that things happened and she went into her bathroom and tried to kill herself."

"How?"

"Bathtub, I went in and pulled her out. She was angry. After awhile she admitted she loved me. I didn't force it. And, I'm not forcing any of this."

"I know. And, I'm okay with you two being together. I get it. Rule 12 doesn't exist in cases like this."

"She's going to need help boss. More than I can give her. Like professional and I don't know that she's going to like the suggestion but I know that her nightmares will continue if I'm not there with her."

"You think she'll do something to herself if you're not there?"

"Yes and I don't want to come home to my place or back here and find out."

"Well, we're going to get her back working. Not field work yet, but she can help Abby and do paper work. And, when that's done, she can stay with Ducky or Jimmy and Breena for a bit if you have to work late."

"Okay, but we can still get her into a therapist right?"

"Yes, we'll find the best. And, we're all here for her too."

"I know. And, thanks boss."

"No problem. Oh, and DiNozzo, take a couple days off with Ziva."

"Really?"

"Yeah, she needs it and so do you."

"Okay, see you soon."Tony says before hanging up. He then goes back into the bedroom where he finds Ziva awake.

"Tony, who were you talking to?"

"Gibbs."

"Oh, what did he want?"

"Just to let us know that he supports us. And, that rule 12 is out the door in times like this."

She puts out her hand for his. "Come lie with me."

His eyes sparkled and he did just that. "How did you sleep?"

"Perfectly. I guess you were just what I needed."

"Well, you'll always have me."

Ziva frowned and looked up at him.

"But, what about when I don't? What then?"

"What do you mean?"

**A/N: **Please read this carefully!If you reviewed my Authors Note you will not be able to review the actual Chapter Six! If you would like, you may send me a PM.


	7. Chapter 7

**7**

**A/N: **Basically, I got no reviews last chapter. From now on, I'm updating only on the weekends. Hopefully, I'll get something from this chapter.

* * *

"Well, I know that I Gibbs won't be allowing in the field because of all of this. So, if you have to work late I know that I will be alone."

"Oh, that. No, I talked to Gibbs about that. If, I have to work late then you will just stay with Ducky or Jimmy until I am done. But, hopefully, there won't be too many nights where that will happen."

"Okay, are they alright with me being with them?"

"Zi, you're family. They love you." He takes her hand to look at her. "I did want to talk to you about something else."

She nods. "Alright."

"How would you feel about seeing someone?"

She looks at him confused. "I'm seeing you, aren't I?"

He chuckles. "Yes, you are. But, I meant a therapist. Someone who can help you more than I or Gibbs or even Ducky."

"You think I need to see a shrink?"

He sighed. "I love you Ziva and yes, I'm worried about you. That's why I made sure that you wouldn't be alone if I had to work late."

"Okay, I guess I'll see one. But, will you meet the therapist with me the first time? And, I have one request."

"Yes, of course I'll go with you. And, anything for you Ziva."

"I would prefer a female to talk to. And I have someone in mind."

Tony smiled. "I'm not sure if who you're thinking about can take on your case, but I'll talk to Gibbs and find out. I bet if we put in a call she'd do it for us."

"I trust her and I don't know maybe she wouldn't want to. I still think in someway she thinks I'm responsible for Kate's death."

"Ziva, Dr. Rachel Cranston does not blame you for Kate's death. And, if you need help, I know that she would help you." He says, leaning in to kiss her.

"So, where do we go from here?"

"Well, we're taking the next couple of days off. After that, we'll go back to NCIS and I'll go back to work and you'll be on desk duty and we'll go from there."

She smiled. "I'd like to take a shower and then I thought maybe we could go for a walk?"

"That sounds like a great idea. I'll be right here. Actually, I'll make breakfast while you shower."

"I love you." She said getting up from the bed.

"I love you too Ziva. I'm proud of you."

She went and took some clothes from her drawers and went into the bathroom and started the shower. And, Tony made his way to the kitchen.

**A/N: **Okay, here is a chapter!


	8. Chapter 8

**8**

**A/N:** Okay, so I had a request for Ziva not to hurt herself anymore. I guess I can do that, but I'm not going to leave out the nightmares or anything else. That would defeat the purpose and title of this story. Sorry!

* * *

Tony fried up some eggs and bacon and also put together some toast. After he was done doing that, he went to check on Ziva.

"Zi, how are you doing?"

"I'm just doing my hair. You can open the door if you want." She called from the other side.

Tony turned the knob and saw her standing in her cargo pants and a shirt. She looked so thin. But, he smiled at her.

"Hi, I put on some coffee and breakfast is ready."

She sniffed the air. "I smell bacon. Yum!"

"Yes, I used up the bacon you had in your fridge. And, I made eggs and toast."

"Wow, you're so wonderful Tony. Now, do you need to shower?"

"I do, but I don't have anything to change into."

"Oh, I suppose you're right. Do you need to go home?"

He nodded. "We can do that later. We'll go together and I'll grab some things. Let's go eat something right now."

Tony pulled out a chair for her as she sat down. He then gave her some hot coffee and joined her.

"This smells and tastes wonderful." She said as she took a bite of the eggs and bacon.

"I'm glad. I'll make something better for dinner. We can go shopping for food, as you do need some."

"Alright, that sounds good."

"I promise, that I'll shower before we do any shopping of any kind or go out in public together."

She laughed and leaned over and kissed him. "Thank you for breakfast Tony."

He grinned. "I love you."

"I love you too."

After they were done and Tony had done the dishes, Tony changed into some running clothes he had in his car.

"You ready for that walk my ninja?" He asked as he walked into the living room.

"I am. Where do you want to walk to?"

"Oh, wherever we decide. Let's just walk. I just want to be with you. And, if you want we can find a bench and talk too."

She looked at him, taking his hand she smiled. "You're amazing, you know that?"

"So are you."

* * *

They walked out the door and down the block. Ziva's hand was resting in Tony's, never leaving it. It was a warm fall day in D.C. And, while she had her hair pulled back some loose strands were blowing in the light breeze that had picked up. They came upon a bench that overlooked the Potomac and sat down on it. Ziva pulled her ponytail holder out of her hair and it all came down. Tony looked at her and smiled.

"What?" She asked him.

"You look beautiful right now. Not that you don't every other time I've seen you, but your hair is gorgeous right now."

"Oh, stop it. It's an absolute mess." She said trying to comb through it with her fingers.

Tony leaned in towards her ear and whispered. "Oh, no beautiful, my ninja. It smells like, lavender and mango. That's a wonderful combination."

Ziva was getting so turned on by what he was saying all she could do was turn and kiss him passionately. All he could do was continue the kiss.

**A/N: **I know it was short but I wanted to get this up and out for you. I've had most of it written most of the week, but like I said I'm only posting once a week now. Might post again tomorrow or Sunday if people review.


	9. Chapter 9

**9**

**A/N: **Thank you to those who reviewed and the new alerts as well. I appreciate it. I will be working on this and possibly another chapter during the NCIS marathon today.

* * *

Ziva smiled against his lips as they both pulled away.

"That was nice." She said.

"Yes, it was. How about we go to my place and pick up some stuff and then we can go back to your place for dinner?"

"Okay, are we going to go there now?"

Yeah, my place isn't far from here and I have my car keys so we can drive back to your place. And, I can shower quick while I'm there too."

She nodded and took his hand as they started walking again. They arrived at his house and went inside. Tony gave Ziva a glass of water and made sure she was comfortable.

"Thank you."

"Are you okay out here while I got shower?"

"Yes, I'll be just fine." She smiled.

He smiled and kissed her head before retreating to his bedroom. Ziva sat back and read a few magazines as she sipped her water. She was actually getting bored waiting for Tony so she got nosy and went towards his bedroom. She stood outside his door for awhile and peeked inside. There she saw him. His body, his hair, it was all so perfect. He threw the towel aside that was used for his hair and removed the one that was around his waist. She must have gasped a little too loudly because she put her hand over her mouth and ran like the wind for his living room. He just smiled as he threw on his jeans and what he knew was one of her favorite Ohio State shirts of hers that he owned.

"Hi." He said walking in by her.

She couldn't even look at him she was so embarrassed. "Hi, there."

"What's going on?"

"Nothing much."

He sat next to her and put his hand on her leg and her heart rate increased. She thought it would be a long time before they would take that next step, but now she wasn't so sure anymore.

"So, did you find enough to do out here while I showered? I suppose you got bored, hmm?" He asked her his breath right on her neck.

"Well, yes I was but then I found something to do you see."

"Oh, really? And, what might that be."

"I became I peeping Tim."

Tony laughed. "That's Tom, but close enough. And, really it's not the same if you're going out with the person."

"But, we never, well you know...and I've never, except when we've been undercover." She looked at him. "It's different this time Tony. It's real, you know?"

"I know Zi, I love you, okay? I always will, no matter what."

Ziva smiled at him. "Let's go shopping and go back to my place. I'm, I'm ready to take that next step with you."

Tony took her hand to face her. "Are you sure? You know that you don't have to say that just because you think it's what I want to hear."

"No, I know that. I know that you'd wait a hundred years for me. I want to Tony. But, I just want to take it slow, you know one step at a time maybe?"

Tony nodded smiling. "Whatever you want Ziva. I'll make your night as special as you are."

**A/N: So, you get a special chapter during the week. Maybe, I'll get more reviews. Next chapter possibly Friday, but I plan to go see THE HOBBIT! Okay, made a few changes!**


	10. Chapter 10

**10**

**A/N: **Well, not many reviews at all. I must be boring everyone again.

* * *

Tony had bought things to make Ziva his famous Italian meal as well as a nice bottle of wine. He was right in the middle of cooking his four hour sauce when Gibbs rang.

"Hey boss, what's up?"

"How's Ziva?"

"She's good, we're good. We're really good right now in fact. We went for a walk and then went back to my place and now I'm making her dinner."

"That's great DiNozzo. You'll be in the day after tomorrow right?"

"Yes, I think one more day will be good. I think we're going to talk about seeing the therapist more."

"Does she still want to see Rachel?" Gibbs asked.

"Oh, yes. I definitely think so. She specifically asked for her. I think Rachel would be best. Besides, I don't want to have Ziva freak out with someone new."

"So, she's been doing okay? I mean she hasn't done anything?"

"No, but I still..." Tony lowered his voice "I'm worried about leaving her."

"I get that and don't worry, she'll be okay. I promise you that."

Tony looked at Ziva who smiled back at him. All he could do was smile back. "She looks so beautiful right now."

"Ah, hell DiNozzo. Go, be with her." Gibbs rolled his eyes but he smiled and Tony knew he was.

"Thank you boss."

"Good night Tony."

"Night boss."

* * *

Tony set the table and poured some wine for he and Ziva while his sauce simmered.

"Here you go beautiful." He said as he handed her the glass of wine.

"Mm, thank you. I've missed this."

Her eyes twinkled and he smiled.

"It's been awhile, hmm?"

"Yeah, it has. I guess, I guess I knew in some way that it would make me more unstable than I already was." She sighed.

"What's wrong Zi?"

"I didn't even know I was Tony, yet I knew to stay away from alcohol."

"That was your subconscious telling you that. So, that's a good thing." He replied sitting next to her.

She cocked her head slightly. "What if I get so unstable that you can't handle it?"

Tony was rather taken aback by what she had just said.

"Come with me Ziva. I want to show you something." He said taking her hand.

Ziva followed him as he took her into the bathroom. He put her in front of the mirror and turned on the light.

"Tony, what are we doing?"

"What do you see Ziva?"

"Tony..."

"Zi?"

"You, me."

"Yes, okay. What do you see in yourself?"

"Tony!" She said getting rather frustrated.

Tony looked at her in the mirror his eyes getting rather bloodshot. "No, I want to know what you see Ziva David. Because, even if you were a crazy unstable ninja I would love you until the end of time. I don't care. I wouldn't care if one day you went unstable. I would still love you. I will always love you." He told her. He then leaned in to kiss her.

Ziva had tears streaming down her eyes. She kissed him back. "Do you still want an answer?" She asked him quietly.

He nodded. "I would prefer one, but I won't push you."

"I'm just scared. I don't want to lose you Tony. That's one of my greatest fears."

He took her into his arms. "Oh, Ziva. You won't. I could never leave you. I think we need to talk about something." He said as he took her hand leading her back into the living room.

She looked at him confused. "Okay."

"How would you like to move in with me?

"Oh, um...really?" Ziva asked with a smile.

**A/N: **Not overly happy with this chapter, but I got something up for you. If I get only 2 reviews again, not sure I'm going to continue.


	11. Chapter 11

**11**

**A/N: **I got some nice reviews and some not so nice reviews. I haven't been in the mood to write, but then I got a really sincere review from someone that made me feel really great. Sorry, that this is so delayed.

* * *

Tony grinned. "So, you'd be okay with moving in with me?"

She nodded. "Are you sure you want that?."

"Of course, why do you think I asked?"

Ziva shrugged her shoulders. Tony looked at her and then took her into his arms. He slowly slipped his hand under her shirt and started to kiss her. She kissed him back and let his hand wander further up.

"Tony..." She whispered huskily as he kissed her neck.

"I want you with me always Ziva, always by my side." He finally got her shirt off of her and threw it to the side. Looking at her he smiled. "You are beautiful Ziva David, so beautiful."

Ziva's scars had healed, but when she looked down at her stomach all she saw was Saleem and a knife. She started to breathe rapidly and she just got up and ran for the bathroom. Tony furrowed his brow. He could have sworn that Ziva wanted this too. He didn't think he misread the signals.

"Ziva?" He called out, tapping on the bathroom door. "Please, let me in. I'm not going to hurt you, I promise."

He checked the door and it was unlocked. Ziva was sitting on the floor with her head between her knees. She lifted her head slowly.

"I'm so sorry Tony. I ruined everything."

He sat down beside her. "No, sweetheart. But, I want to know what you were seeing."

"My scars and Saleem. He's my worst scar."

"You know that, that scar is dead right Zi? He can never hurt you again and I promise I will do whatever I can to help you to get over the remaining scars."

Ziva lifted up her shirt that she had put back on. "I have scars that have remained. Do you see them?"

Tony shook his head. "No, all I see is beauty Ziva. But, I see the emotional scars and before you ask no it doesn't scare me off. I have them too and I know that you know that."

She nodded her head leaning into him. "I love you Tony, so much."

He helped her up. "I love you too."

Ziva sat on the couch and waited for Tony. She really wanted to take the step with Tony, but if she couldn't even make out with him how would she ever make love to him. She worried about his needs more than hers. Because, he indeed had needs that needed to be met and he was the most important thing in her life right now. She even thought that one day maybe, they might get married and have a family. But, that would never happen if she couldn't move on and make that very big step. Tony was in the bathroom and decided to make a call to someone other than Gibbs. He knew he was treading on dangerous waters, but he had to do this. If he hurt Ziva he would never forgive himself, not in a million years. He couldn't call Gibbs because if he did he would tell Tony just to stay put. And, right now he needed air. He needed air because he felt like he was going to lose it with everything that was going on.

"Tony, what's wrong?" Abby asked answering her phone.

"Hey, Abbs. I need a favor. A really big one that involves Ziva."

Abby's eyes went wide. "What's going on? Is she okay? Are you?"

"Yes and no. I can't explain everything right now because she's in the other room. We're at my place. I just need to go out for a bit and I can't leave her alone. She's really fragile right now."

"Tony, what's going on?"

"I need air Abbs, a lot is going on. I love her. I love her so much and it's affected me more than I thought it would. I don't need her to see that. She freaked out when we were getting intimate. I'm not going to rush her on anything and no I'm not leaving her I just need air." Tony said his voice getting choked up.

Abby could tell he was about to cry. "I'm on my way. I'm so sorry Tony. I love both of you, I hope you know that?"

"Love you too Abbs." Tony said before hanging up.

**A/N: **So, I had an emotional Tony in this chapter. I need some ideas please. Or, let me know if you like this idea. I'll obviously continue with Abby if you like it.


	12. Chapter 12

**12**

**A/N: **Thank you for all the great reviews. And, I had to laugh at one guest review that I quickly deleted that said I was a 'generic' writer and have no idea what generic means. Anyways, here is one chapter and another will come later.

* * *

Abby had come rather quickly and knocked on the door. Tony came back out and Ziva looked at him concerned.

"Tony, are you okay?"

He just shook his head and grabbed his jacket and keys. "I love you Ziva. I'll be back in a little while."

Abby stepped in and just looked at him as he walked out kissing the side of her head. "Thank you." He whispered.

Tears started to roll down Ziva's cheeks. "What the hell is going on here? Why did Tony leave me?"

"He didn't Ziva. He called me in a panic, tears really. I think he's about to have a breakdown and he needed to leave and get some air before it got really bad."

"Oh, Abby, I did this to him. I love him and I did this to him."

"Ziva, I think all of this has been building up over time. He loves you more than anything. He told me that when he called me. He also said he isn't going to leave you so don't you dare put that thought in your mind. I'm not sure where he is going, but I hope he goes to talk to Gibbs or maybe even McGee."

"He asked me to move in with him."

"That's great! Are you going to?"

"Yes, I want to. But, I don't want to hurt him."

"You won't Ziva. He's hurting because of everything that happened to you. And, I think he's afraid to let on."

"He can't blame himself Abbs. What happened in Somalia, it wasn't his fault. Going in I knew what could happen. And, there are things I haven't told anyone that did happen."

Abby looked at her. "Not even Gibbs and Ducky?"

"Not even them. I have felt to ashamed. And, to tell Tony I don't know, I'm not sure how to begin. I think I need to tell Dr. Cranston first and maybe go from there."

"What about me Ziva? Would you tell me? I mean, I know in the beginning things were very different. But, now you know that you're one of my very best friends. I would never judge you."

Ziva gave her a small but sincere smile. "Oh, I know you wouldn't. I'm just not sure you want to hear what I have to say." Ziva replied as her tears started up again.

Abby placed her arm around her friend and held her close. "I love you Ziva. Of course, I want to hear it. I mean, when you were gone all I could think of was if you were okay. I didn't know. I do want to know and I won't tell anyone what you tell me here."

"Not even Tony?"

"Not even Tony."

"Well, Tony knows all about me being raped several times. What he doesn't know is that I got pregnant and miscarried while I was held captive. I never should have allowed myself to let that happen."

"Ziva, the pregnancy and miscarriage, it wasn't your fault. You were raped, part of a violent crime. And, I do think you should tell Tony."

Ziva just nods. "We've never talked about marriage or having kids, but, what if he wants to have them? I'm not sure that I can because of how violent it was."

"Ziva, Tony cares more about you being okay then being able to have children. He knows that you could always adopt or have a child another way if you want a family. Well, that is if you were to tell him." Abby said squeezing her hand.

"Thank you Abby. I think I might need to tell him with Gibbs in the room. I don't want him breaking down."

"You're going to tell Gibbs?"

"Yeah, I think I should. He's more like my real father anyways. Will come too again?"

"Of course, I will. Anything, you want Ziva. I'll always be here to support you."

"Now, I just need Tony to come home." Ziva said as she watched the minutes and hours go by on the clock.

Abby sighed. She hoped that wherever Tony was that he was being responsible.

* * *

Tony was out walking and sat down on a bench and just looked up at the stars. He thought about how beautiful they were. Almost as beautiful as Ziva.

"Are you okay Tony?" A voice asked sitting next to him.

"Tim, what are you doing here? And, yes I'm just fine."

"Abby, called me. She was worried about you."

Tony sighed. "I just needed air. I told her that."

"She said you need to go back and soon. Ziva needs you."

"I'll go home soon. I promise."

"Alright, well if you need anything, I'm always around."

"Thanks Tim."

Tim smiled and went on his way. Tony got up and started to walk again. He reached his house and saw that Abby and Ziva were still talking. As he walked in Ziva met him at the door.

"Tony, where have you been?"

**A/N: **Okay, not the greatest chapter but, I wanted to get something out before I went out for a bit.


	13. Chapter 13

**13**

**A/N: **Thank you for the great reviews.

* * *

Tony looked at her for a moment and then he spoke. "I just needed some air. I'm sorry."

She took his hand and pulled him gently towards the couch. "Come with me Tony. We need to talk."

He shook his head. "Can it wait? I mean, I just, I just want to hold you Ziva. I don't want to let you go for the rest of the night."

Ziva pulled him in and just held on. "Yeah, it can wait," She looked at Abby who just nodded and gave her the 'call me' sign along with an 'I love you.'

"Will you lie next to me in bed?"

"I'll go wherever you are Tony. You had me so worried. But, I need to tell you something." She said squeezing his hand. "I do need to talk to you tomorrow, I know that you don't want to talk right now and what I have to tell you is really heavy. Abby is going to comeback over and Gibbs is coming as well."

Tony looked at her. "Zi, you're not dying are you? Please tell me that right now."

"No, I'm not dying." She put her hand on his cheek and ran her thumb over his tears.

"I want you to be okay Tony, but I feel like what happened to me has had just as much affect on you as it has had on me."

"I just want you to be okay."

She leaned in and kissed him and he continued it. "I will be okay. I talked with Abby about things and that helped. She encouraged me to come clean to you and Gibbs about them. Not, that I was intending on hiding them for good, just that I wasn't ready to tell you yet."

He took her hand. "I understand. So, you're going to tell me all of this stuff tomorrow?"

She nodded and got up and motioned for him to come with. "Let's go to bed."

"Are you sure, you're okay sharing the bed with me?"

She smiled. "I'm sure. I love you Tony and I'll never stop."

"I love you Ziva David." Tony said sitting on the edge of his bed.

Ziva watched him as he took off his shoes. She could tell he was worn out. Emotionally so. He finally changed into some sweats and a t-shirt and she was already changed and joined him in bed. After lying there awhile she put her head on his chest and moved her arm protectively around him. She felt him shake and looked up at him.

"Tony?"

"I'm okay Ziva. I'm just thinking about what you told me is all."

She sighed. "I shouldn't have brought it up. I should have just waited." She replied going to move away.

"No, Zi. I didn't mean it like that. I'm glad you told me. I'm just worried about the fact that you invited Gibbs over and all."

She nodded. "I should have come clean with all of you in the beginning about it. I didn't because I was ashamed. I know now that I should have."

Tony brought her back to him. "You never have to be ashamed of anything with me or any of your family for that matter." He kissed her temple. She closed her eyes and started to fall asleep. Tony was just talking to her softly saying little things here and there about how he would make her happy. She had a smile on her face when she finally did fall asleep and he looked over at her. He rested his head against hers and closed his eyes saying a silent prayer that everything would be okay between them.

**A/N: **Next chapter will be Ziva tells Tony and Gibbs. Merry Christmas EVE! Well, to all those who celebrate. And, Merry Christmas to those who live overseas where it is already December 25th!


	14. Chapter 14

**14**

**A/N: **I wanted to get started on this chapter for all my wonderful reviewers.

* * *

Ziva was wrapped up in Tony's arms all warm and cozy. She didn't even think about moving. Tony however had to move. He smiled at her beautiful sleeping form and kissed her softly.

"Good morning sleeping beauty." He said ever so quietly.

"Mm, what time is it?"

"Time for Tony to use the head, but you're wrapped around me." He said with a slight chuckle.

Ziva woke up after she heard that. "Oh, sorry about that. I didn't mean to do that."

He kissed her again. "I didn't mind, believe me."

She smiled and got off of him. "Did you sleep okay?"

"Just perfect. You?"

"Ditto." She replied.

Tony came back out of the bathroom and sat next to her. "Will you tell me now Zi? I know that you want to tell me when Gibbs gets here but, I was wondering if you'd feel comfortable enough to tell me alone?"

"If I tell you Tony, you have to promise me something and I mean really promise me."

"Okay, I can try. I mean, yes Zi I promise you that I'll do anything for you, you know that."

"When I tell Gibbs you go over and be with McGee, because I don't need you getting upset with him around. It's going to be hard enough for me to tell you and then to have to tell Gibbs."

"I'm that bad, huh?"

She took his hand and squeezed it. "No, you just care that much. And, I love you and care about you so much that I don't need anything happening to you."

Tony nodded. "Alright, to McGee's it is."

"Let's go make some coffee first and then I'll tell you. I want us to be comfortable."

"Alright, let's go."

After making some coffee and a light breakfast, they sat down on the couch in the living room. Ziva looked up at Tony and tried to figure out how to begin.

"First off, going into the camp I knew that things could possibly happen. I was the only woman around for all these men. During my second, maybe third week in I was brutally raped several times over a three day period. I didn't sleep or eat," She looked at him briefly. He took her hand and she continued. "About two months later, just before you rescued me, I suffered a miscarriage. I knew I was miscarrying because I had severe cramping and was bleeding really bad. When we came back I was checked out by another doctor because I didn't want Ducky to know. I didn't want Gibbs or anyone else to find out what had happened. It still hurts me to think that I could allow this to happen."

All Tony could do was take her in his arms and hold her. "And, you didn't allow this to happen. They forced themselves on you. No one allows rape to happen Ziva."

She nodded and looked at him in the eyes. "Another reason, I realized I should tell you was because well, maybe I'm stepping on ground I shouldn't be yet but we haven't really talked about a future together and well if we were ever to want a family should we be together I'm not sure that I can have children. And, I'm afraid that making love is going to be painful because of what they did to me and I want to make love to you."

"You're not going to share all this with Gibbs are you?" Tony asked being serious.

"No, but I might about the children part. He's family Tony. He is to you too. He's not going to sit there and say oh, to much information there Ziva."

"I know Zi, but some of this stuff is between just us. Like the love making stuff. Or, did you share that with Abby?"

"Not in the detail I just did with you, but yes I did. She's our friend and my best friend Tony. I didn't tell you this to turn it into an argument. And, no I won't tell Gibbs any intimate details between us unless I see fit."

"I'm sorry Ziva, I shouldn't have said anything. You have the right to tell Gibbs whatever you want."

"No, I understand what you're saying Tony. I'm bringing up a lot of stuff you probably didn't expect. I mean, I'm not pushing you to propose to me or for us to go into the bedroom and conceive a child right now."

Tony's eyes went wide. The truth was he wanted to marry Ziva even if they hadn't been on a proper date. They had been through so much together as partners it was like they had already been together for years. "I know that Ziva. And, I'm also not going to push you to do anything you're not ready for."

"I wasn't ready before when we started to make out, but now I want to try if you're willing."

"I'm willing to do anything when it comes to you."

Ziva smiled. "Well, anything more than kissing will have to wait until later because Gibbs will be here in twenty minutes."

"I feel like I should be taking this more serious than I am." He said.

"You've already done that Tony. Believe me."

"How is that?"

"You've supported me, been there for me and you rescued me Tony."

He moved closer to her and kissed her. "I never gave that a second thought. I wish I could have found you sooner though. I'm sorry you had to go through all that pain."

"No more pain Tony, only happiness when I'm with you. I had pain yes, but you make me so happy."

"You make me happy too."

Ziva moved to sit on his lap and started to really kiss him. She had moved her hand slowly up his shirt when the doorbell rang. He grinned against her lips.

"Good timing with Gibbs."

Ziva laughed. "Actually, I think it is. Because, I believe this would have gone much further if he would have no arrived."

"We can pick up where we left off later?" He asked.

"Yes, I do hope so."

Tony went and answered the door and saw both Abby and Gibbs. Abby grinned at Tony and Gibbs kind of rolled his eyes.

"Good morning boss, Abbs."

"Hi, guys!"

"Well, I'm off to McGee's. I'll see you later Zi." He said giving her a kiss.

She smiled and welcomed Gibbs and Abby.

* * *

Gibbs gave Ziva a kiss on her cheek. "Hi, kid. How are you?"

"I'm okay. Better than I was a couple of days ago. It's Tony who I'm worried about now, but that's not why I called you over here."

Gibbs nodded. "You can tell me about that later. Right now, I need you to tell me what's going on with you. I almost came over last night but Abby called me last night to make sure I wouldn't do that."

She gave him a small smile. "Well, it's a lot to take in so I hope you're ready."

Abby came back with some coffee and a glass of bourbon just in case.

Ziva started to explain and she could see that Gibbs was already starting to get upset. "I didn't kill enough of them." Gibbs said so quietly you almost couldn't hear him.

Ziva's relationship with Gibbs was unlike any other. He was her father and she had let him know many times. She took his hand and squeezed it tight. "No, Gibbs. Please don't say that."

His bright blue eyes had tears in them. "I never should have left you in Israel. A real father wouldn't have done that."

She shook her head. The last thing she wanted for him was to feel guilty. Now, her tears were coming. "No, that, that was tough love. You came for me. My getting pregnant and miscarrying, I don't blame anyone but myself for getting into that situation."

"Ziva, what did I tell you about that?" Abby butted in.

"Yes, I know. I'm not responsible. Tony said the same thing."

"Well, they're both right. You're not. And, I'm so sorry Ziver that it happened. I'm sorry that you held it in for so long that you couldn't tell me."

"I was ashamed Gibbs. I'm not sure that I can ever have children and I had to break that news to Tony this morning."

"Do you think he took it harder than he let on?"

"Yes, I do. I know his love for me is genuine and he even gave me subtle hints that he wants to marry me. I would say yes, but I want to be able to give him children."

Gibbs looked at Ziva who still looked so broken. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"Let's just say Tony was open to adoption, would you be okay with that? I mean if you couldn't have children."

"Yes, of course. But, I also want to be able to be intimate with my husband. And, because of what happened I might not be able to do that. I'm hoping things will change tonight though."

Gibbs just held her close for a long time. She breathed in his scent. He smelled like sandalwood and coffee. She just smiled as her tears fell.

"I love you Ziver."

"I love you too Gibbs."

**A/N: **So, quite a bit of father/daughter stuff between Gibbs and Ziva. And, Abby just came for moral support so, she was just kind of in the background.


	15. Chapter 15

**15**

**A/N: **Again, thank you for the great reviews. And for all the new people who have put this story on alert.

* * *

Tony came home about forty five minutes later. Abby and Gibbs had stayed with Ziva to make sure she would be okay. He looked at Ziva when he walked in and she just nodded and smiled.

"I think we should be going Gibbs." Abby said looking at him.

Gibbs nodded and then went over by Tony. "You've done a good job taking care of her Tony."

"Thank you boss. Are you doing okay?"

"Yes, I'm okay. I'm a little worried about you."

"Me?" Tony laughed. "I'm fine boss. I'm moving in with the woman I love and everyday she's getting better. Why are you worried about me?"

Gibbs motioned for him to go into his kitchen so they could talk more. "Oh, because of some of the things that Ziva has told you over the last couple of days. I mean, I know it hasn't been easy on either one of you. And, I know she mentioned family and intimacy..." Gibbs stopped and looked at him.

Tony sighed. "I'm okay boss. We'll get past it. Ziva's family and I plan on making her part of mine very soon."

"If you need to talk, you know that my door is always open."

Tony smiled. "Thank you. And, I might take you up on it sometime."

Gibbs just nodded and put his hand on Tony's shoulder. "See you tomorrow?"

"Yes, I'm bringing Ziva in and I think she's going to spend part of the day helping Abby and some doing paperwork. After that, she has an appointment with Dr. Cranston."

"Are you going with her?" Gibbs asked.

"For the first one at least. Ziva asked if I would. Not sure how long I'll stay, but I'm going to be there for her. I won't miss anymore days, if that's what Vance is wondering."

"No, actually Vance is being really supportive. He understands it and if you ever feel comfortable sharing any of it with him..."

Tony shook his head. "Not right now I don't. And, I'm pretty sure I speak for Ziva in that respect as well." Tony furrowed his brow. "Don't quite trust him yet, but I'm glad I'm not in the dog house with him."

Abby jingled Gibbs' car keys to get his attention and he just threw her a smirk.

"I get it Abbs, we're going."

Ziva just laughed as she and Tony showed them out.

"See you tomorrow." Ziva called out.

Tony smiled at Ziva and pulled her closely as he closed the door. "Finally, I have you alone."

"I enjoyed having them here."

He didn't respond he just leaned in and kissed her. "I know, but I wanted just a little more time with you before we have to go back to work tomorrow."

Ziva kissed him again and looked at him. She didn't want to ruin the mood but what she was about to bring up might just do that.

"Tony, I was talking to Gibbs and while Abby wasn't exactly thrilled with this idea, he did support me and I, I'm hoping that I'll have yours as well."

"What for Zi?"

"Well, I'm going to work really hard at therapy and my recovery and I'm hoping if Dr. Cranston see's that I'm fit to return to the field then I'm going to do just that. But, there are some other things I need to do first before any of that happens."

"Ziva, you know that I support you. I'd support you on anything, but..." Tony needed to choose his words carefully. "But, I don't need you going out there unless, unless you are 100% are close to it."

She nodded. "Gibbs said the same thing. He doesn't want to get a call saying one of his agents is down or that all of a sudden I froze up at a scene."

"What are the other things that need to be taken care of?"

"I want to become a legal citizen of the United States."

"Well, what if you were just to get married?"

"I want to be a citizen Tony. Are you asking me?"

Tony scratched the back of his head. "I'm going to ask you Ziva." He laughed nervously. "But, I wasn't planning on doing that tonight. I hope you're not disappointed?"

"No, not at all. You can help me become a citizen. Will you?"

"Of course I will. My ninja is going to be a citizen of the United States of America." He grinned.

**A/N: **I took a rare day off for my health and sanity. Now, I'm going off to enjoy it. Enjoy the chapter. More later!


	16. Chapter 16

**16**

**A/N: **Thank you to those that reviewed. I planned to have this posted before the New Year, but I actually ended up going on after work.

* * *

Tony took Ziva's hand and led her to the bedroom. She followed closing the door behind her.

"Are you ready or would you rather wait?"

"I want to try and if we need to stop I'll tell you, okay?"

"Alright, because I want this to be special Ziva. I don't want to rush you."

She shook her head. "You're not. I promise." She went for his shirt and removed it.

She let him remove hers and she just stood there in her bra and blushed.

"God, you're so beautiful Ziva."

"You're incredibly sexy Tony." She responded with a kiss.

He moved her back towards the bed and her hands were down at his jeans. He removed her pants and she fell back on the bed moving back to the pillows. Tony slowly started to kiss her as he removed her bra and threw it across the room. Ziva let out a small gasp as his fingers crept lower to her underwear. He massaged her breasts gently and Ziva put her head back in pleasure as he kissed her stomach.

"I love you Ziva. Remember, if this is too much I'll stop." Tony said as he removed his boxers."

They moved under the covers as they made love. Ziva moved around a few times as she adjusted to him. She let out a few tears and Tony wiped them away. He asked if she was okay and if he should continue.

"I'm good, it's just been awhile." She said as she entangled her leg with his. "I love you, thank you for being so gentle with me."

He kissed her temple. There bodies mangled with sweat. It had been pure passion, just like each of them had imagined. He was so gentle with her and she enjoyed every moment of it. Unlike the first time when they had tried, she didn't stop him this time.

"I'll always be gentle with you Ziva." He said as he looked down at her.

She smiled up at him, rolling as close to him as she possibly could. Closing her eyes she fell asleep, his arm protectively around her. He fell asleep a few moments later and held her all through the night. Waking up the next morning Tony turned to look at a sleeping Ziva. He realized they would have to have to get out of bed very soon.

"Mm, I want to stay in bed with you all day. Can we just call Gibbs and tell him we're going to do that?"

He grinned. "Not sure he'd like that much, besides we have to go make some money."

"Oh, right." She said pulling his face down to meet her lips. "You go shower and I'll make breakfast and then I'll go shower."

He nodded and pulled on his boxers and walked to his bathroom. She put on one of his t-shirts and went into the kitchen to make breakfast. After he finished his shower and got dressed he went into the kitchen and moved behind her and kissed her neck.

"I love you."

"I love you, Tony." She said as she kissed him and went to take a quick shower herself.

Tony finished up breakfast and waited for Ziva to return. He turned around and there she was in some very nice pants and a beautiful blue shirt that made her brown eyes stand out. All he could do was smile.

"What?" She asked.

"I love that color on you."

"Blue?"

"It makes your eyes stand out. You're so beautiful." He replied as he took a bite out of a piece of toast.

"Well, thank you Tony. You're pretty damn handsome yourself."

They ate breakfast and then got their things together for their return to NCIS. Tony went into one of his rooms to collect something and found Ziva just standing in a trance.

"Zi, what's wrong?" He asked as he touched her shoulder.

He startled her because she jolted as his hand touched her. "Hmm? Oh, nothing. I'm okay." She said looking at him.

"Ziva, what's going on? You were fine just seconds ago and now when I come back out from getting my gun you're just standing here in a trance."

"Well, to be honest, I was thinking about what brought me to this point. I don't want go there again."

"You mean discharging your gun?"

She nodded. "I have to pass all of that, not to mention a psych test beforehand."

"And, you will. It may not be right away and it may not be this month Ziva. But, you will get there. I promise you that."

She sighed and nodded. "Okay, just needed a little reassurance I guess. I'm sorry."

"No, don't be. It's alright."

"I'm ready to go when you are."

"Okay, well then lets go." Tony said taking her hand.

* * *

They rolled up to NCIS about fifteen minutes later and walked in together.

Gibbs smiled as he saw them. "Hey, you two."

"Hi boss." Tony said putting his things away. "It's good to be back, you know."

"That's good. We already have a case."

Ziva smiled and nodded. "Be careful. I'll go down and help Abby. Or would you rather I stay up here and do paperwork?"

"You can go down by Abbs for a bit. Dr. Cranston will come down and pick you up there."

"Tony was suppose to be there with me." Ziva furrowed her brow. "Okay, I'll meet with her alone."

"I'm sorry Ziver. I knew that and I totally forgot. I owe you one okay?" Gibbs said kissing her head.

She just smiled. "I'll be okay Gibbs. I have to be strong at some point."

"You're the strongest one I know. We'll be back soon and you and Tony can leave early tonight."

The team left for their case and Ziva went down by Abby. She filled in Abby on meeting with Dr. Cranston and how she felt comfortable talking with her. Abby hugged her and told her that she too was there for her if she wanted to talk.

"So, how did last night go with Tony?" Abby asked.

Ziva looked at Abby. "It was um, it was beautiful. He was so wonderful Abby."

"You really do love him don't you?"

"Oh, yes, I sure do. And, he's actually hinted at marriage. When he asks I'm going to say yes. He was so gentle with me. No other man would ever do that for me."

"I'm so happy for you Ziva. You deserve to be happy and I know how much Tony loves you. I can't wait to see what happens for you two."

"Thank you Abby, thank you so much for being here for me through all of this."

"Anytime, you're my best friend. I'll always be here for you." Abby replied as she took some sample and put them into one of her machines.

A few minutes later as they sat back talking, Dr. Cranston walked in. "Hi, Ziva, Abby. How are you?"

Ziva looked up. "Hello, Dr. Cranston. I'm good. How are you?"

"Very well. Are you ready to go?" She asked with a smile.

"I am. Bye Abby, see you later."

"Bye Ziva, bye Dr. Cranston." Abby called out.

Ziva and Dr. Cranston stepped into the elevator and headed for the conference room.

**A/N:** Not entirely happy with this chapter, but I wanted to get one out for you. Happy New Year!


	17. Chapter 17

**17**

**A/N:** Sorry I'm so late. Thank you to those who reviewed and to my new followers. I appreciate it. I did put my link to fan fiction up on my Tumblr page but I think I'm going to remove it.

* * *

Ziva looked around the conference room. A room she had been in so many times. Then she looked at Dr. Cranston, a woman who she respected. A woman, who's sister her half brother Ari Haswari killed. Rachel could see she was in deep thought and moved her hand slightly to touch Ziva's.

"What's on your mind Agent David?"

Ziva was in her trance again. She sighed as she came out of it slowly. "You."

Dr. Cranston looked at her. "Why is that?"

Ziva's eyes were welling up with tears. "I wonder sometimes, if because I was related to..."

"No, Ziva. Stop right now. I could never blame you. You're nothing like him."

"How do you know that?"

"Because, Tony and Gibbs tell me. And, because I know so. Ziva, you did not kill my sister. Just because he was related to you does not mean that monster is inside of you."

"But, he killed Tony and Abby's best friend. I know how Tony felt about her. Even if he never really let on."

"Tony loves you Ziva. That's how he really feels about you. And, Kate and he were like brother and sister. Yes, he loved Kate and took her death really hard but if he knew the truth I'm sure that he wouldn't blame you."

"He can never know Dr. Cranston. I'm not sure what would happen if he ever knew. Or Abby, McGee. You and Gibbs are the only ones. Well, other than Vance and Sec Nav."

She nodded. "Why won't you tell him? I mean you've told him some pretty deep things that have happened in your life, why not this?"

"It involves Gibbs. I'm not sure he wants me too. Then again if we get married, I don't want to start off our marriage like this. I need to talk to him. Him, meaning Gibbs and then I'll go from there."

"I guess it was a good thing that he forgot about Tony coming with you today, hmm?"

Ziva gave her a small smile. "Yes, I guess so. I'm sorry I got so emotional. I thought I was getting better at that."

Dr. Cranston looked at her. "Who told you that you couldn't get emotional?"

"I want to get back into the field. But, if I'm emotionally unstable I can't be out there, let alone be with a gun. I feel more stable then I was when Tony came to stay with me and that wasn't even that long ago."

"Ziva, I don't feel that you're going to snap. And, I'm not going to go to Gibbs or Vance and say you're not ready. I just want to be here for you to talk. I think a week and maybe two at most at your desk just taking a breather would be good."

"Okay, I guess I can deal with that. Do you think I could take my firearms test?"

She nodded. "I think I can arrange for that. But, only on duty would you be able to have it. Do you have a sidearm?"

"Yes, but I'm living with Tony now and we keeps ours together in lock box. I'll make sure he takes mine."

"Are you okay with me sharing everything with Gibbs?"

"Yes, of course. He's my medical proxy and well pretty much my father the way I see him." Ziva smiled.

Rachel smiled. "That's wonderful Ziva."

"Thank you Dr. Cranston, for helping me."

"You're welcome Ziva. And, we'll meet again in a few days or sooner if you should need to."

Ziva nodded as she got up and smiled at her. "Goodbye."

"Bye."

Ziva left the conference room feeling a little better. She knew she had to see Gibbs so she set out looking for him, hoping that they would be back from their crime scene by now. As she was walking down the stairs Tony smiled at her and she waved at him.

"Hi." He said.

"Hi, I missed you."

"How was your session?"

"It was good. I actually need to talk to Gibbs, is he here?"

"Down with Ducky, should be back any minute. So, that means I can grab a quick kiss from my beautiful ninja."

Ziva smiled as Tony pulled her in and McGee just looked on shaking his head smiling. Gibbs came back a couple of minutes later just as they stopped their little make out session.

"Hey, Ziver."

"Gibbs, I need to speak with you in your office. It's kind of important." Ziva said.

"Okay, lets go."

They went into the elevator and he looked at her.

"What's up?" He asked.

**A/N: **So, here's the latest chapter. Let me know!


	18. Chapter 18

**18**

**A/N: **I see I've lost some reviewers but, I'm thankful for the ones that have stayed and the alerts that keep coming.

* * *

Ziva took a breath and thought carefully about what she was going to say before it all came out. Gibbs placed his hand on her arm gently.

"Ziver, you okay?"

She nodded. "Gibbs, I need to tell Tony about that night in your basement. You know the night I killed Ari."

Gibbs stepped back against the elevator wall and was silent. The silence scared her. She didn't like it one bit.

"I don't know about that Ziver. I mean, you two have a good thing going right now."

"I know we do, but I also want to be honest with him and I think he deserves to know what happened that night. He should have known a long time ago."

Gibbs nodded. "Alright, tell him exactly how it happened. I was there, he had my sniper rifle and well you know the rest."

"I do."

Ziva looked at him. He sighed. "If you have second thoughts or run into problems and want me there, just let me know."

She nodded. "Thank you Gibbs. Are you sure you're okay with all of this?"

"Well, I know that you want to be open with him. And, if you want to tell him something this big then yes, I'm okay with it. But, I want you to realize that Tony won't be the only one who will find out."

"I know, I realize that the others will find out too. I will deal with that as it comes."

Gibbs nodded as he flipped the switch to take them back up. He kissed her head. "I'm always here for you."

"And, I for you." She replied smiling.

Tony looked at her as she got off and wondered if she was okay.

"You two go home. I know that you need to talk. I'll see you tomorrow." Gibbs said looking at Tony and Ziva.

"Okay, boss. See you in the morning." Tony replied.

Ziva grabbed her stuff and took Tony's hand. "I'm sorry Tony."

Tony looked at her confused. "For what Ziva?"

As they made their way into the parking structure, Ziva took his hand towards the car. They got into the car and she looked at him. "Do you remember the night before Kate's funeral?"

"Yes, kind of I guess."

"Well, long story short, Ari Haswari was my half-brother and I killed him to save Gibbs' life."

Tony didn't say anything for what seemed like hours. He just looked at her and then he finally spoke. "What? Where did you do this Ziva?"

"Gibbs' basement, top of the stairs. I had to. And, I wanted to tell you about all of this because I felt like you should know."

"Shouldn't we have known years ago? I mean come on Ziva this is big news. You shot your own brother. And, what about Gibbs? Was he going to keep on lying to me, to all of us?"

Ziva looked up at him. "He's involved Tony, but I did it. Don't be mad at him. He'd be dead had I not pulled that trigger. If you want to be mad or rather angry at someone then I am that person. But, it had to be done."

"Why did you decide to tell me now?"

"I wanted to start our future, if we have one now on truths. I didn't want anymore lies. I talked it over with Dr. Cranston and with Gibbs. You have no idea how big of a step this is for me."

They just sat silent in the car for awhile. Tony was still taking everything in and Ziva wondered if he was going to kick her out. She prayed that he wouldn't, but after everything that she had just told him she was so sure. He looked over at her and started the car.

"Let's just go home and will figure everything out there."

All Ziva could do was just look down. Tears poured down her cheeks as they drove the ten minute ride to Tony's apartment. She was silent getting out and didn't say anything and either did he.

**A/N: **Okay, so I had trouble writing this chapter, so please go easy on me. Yes, it was angsty. Anyways, here it is. That's all for awhile.


	19. Chapter 19

**19**

**A/N: **I'm sorry I disappointed everyone in the last chapter. I have found someone who has been kind enough to offer to go through my chapters as time allows her. I asked for a 'beta' reader several times but no one wanted to. Yet, they told me what a crappy writer I was. Go figure!

* * *

Ziva went into the bedroom to grab some clothes. She then closed the door to the bathroom as she changed into some yoga pants and a long sleeve shirt. Tony had poured himself a drink when he realized that she was gone.

"Ziva?" Tony called out.

"Yes?" She said, stepping out of the bathroom looking at him.

"Where were you?"

"I was changing and I called Abby. I'm going to stay with her for a few nights."

"No, Ziva. We need to figure this out. If you go stay with her, then you need to tell her and if you do that you know what will happen. Kate was her best friend."

Ziva's eyes were all bloodshot and her hair was down from that day's hairdo. "I let you down Tony. I can't stay here. I'll call Gibbs then and go stay with him. You hate me anyways and probably don't want to be with me anymore." She said walking towards the bathroom again.

"Don't go Ziva. Please?"

"Why Tony? I mean, you're right. Kate was Abby's best friend, I'm just the whatever you want to call me."

"I shouldn't have said that Ziva. I misspoke. Kate was her best friend, but you are too. Abby..."

Ziva looked up at him. "I know Tony. She'd be mad, but not for long right?"

"I would make sure of that. Or, at least I'd try. I would explain it to her or have Gibbs do it. She'd have to listen then."

She just shook her head and gave him a small smile. "I wouldn't expect that of Abby and you know that Tony."

"I don't want you to go Ziva. I still love you. That hasn't stopped and if you think it has or it did or it will then forgive me for saying this but you're crazy."

Ziva looked at him. "What?"

"I said I love you."

"Tony..."

"Ziva, are you doubting my love?"

"No, but why aren't you mad at me or yelling or something? I mean, a few minutes ago you basically wanted me out or I wanted me out..." Ziva sighed and ran a hand through her hair.

"You wanted you out. I said we should come home and talk about this. I would never throw you out. I want to marry you and have children, if we're able. Zi, yes you and Gibbs should have told all of us about this from the beginning but I understand why you didn't. It couldn't happen at the time. Kate just died and you just came in. So, promise me we'll be truthful from now on about everything else that goes on in our lives, no matter what may happen?"

"Yes, I do. That is really why I told you. I wanted to be truthful with you. I had to talk Gibbs into letting me tell you. I told him that if I wanted a real future with you then it would start with me telling you all of this."

Tony reached over and took her phone and sent a text. "There, now you don't have to worry about Abby coming to pick you up."

"Why?"

"I told her not to come. Besides, I think we'll be fine right here. Don't you?"

She smiled and nodded. "I do. But, will we be okay overall?"

He cupped her face, placing her hair behind her ear. "Always Zi. And, no matter what happens in our lives we will always be together. I want you to believe that." He said placing his forehead against hers.

**A/N: **Having some problems getting started again. I'm going to have to brainstorm. I've asked for ideas but no one gives any so, that causes delays too. I would like to thank the very nice reviews I got and those who put me on alert as well.


	20. Chapter 20

**20**

**A/N: **This chapter is a bit mature!

Disclaimer: Disclaimed!

* * *

Tony built a fire in the fireplace and sat back down next to Ziva. She put her head on his chest and he massaged it gently.

"What are you thinking about?"

"How to tell Abby and McGee."

He lifted her onto his lap. "Zi, don't think about that right now. We have plenty of time to think about that. Okay?"

She nodded. "Alright."

He kissed her and she kissed him back. Tony looked at her and smiled.

"Marry me Ziva."

She put her hand on his face. "Marriage is permanent Tony, or at least to me it is. Are you sure you..."

"Ziva..."

She let out a small laugh. "Yes, I will marry you Anthony DiNozzo. I want my forever with you."

"Good, let's order some dinner."

"Pizza?" She suggested.

He grabbed his phone. "Perfect!"

After eating their pizza and some garlic bread, Tony took Ziva's hand and they made their way to the bedroom. He removed her shirt and kissed her neck as she removed his pants. Ziva flipped them over so she was on top and he smiled up at her.

"That wasn't my knee, in case you were wondering."

"I was hoping not." She said kissing him hard.

He flipped them back over as they made love. Ziva scrapped her nails along his back and wrapped her legs around his in pleasure and to feel his closeness. After they were done, she moved next to him and he wrapped her up in his arms. She leaned in and kissed him.

"I love you Ziva."

"I love you Tony." She said putting her head on his chest as she closed her eyes.

He massaged her head until she fell asleep and then he fell asleep a short time later.

* * *

The next morning despite being so tired, they knew they had to get up for work. Tony kissed her awake, starting at her neck moving his way down.

"Mm, Tony if you keep doing that we won't make it into work." She said pulling him in for a kiss.

"You're beautiful, you know that?"

She laughed. "I'm lying here naked."

He grinned. "So, am I."

"I like that."

"Well, I promise more of this tonight but we must get dressed if we plan to get to work on time."

She sat up and pulled the sheet over her. "Why don't you get dressed and make the coffee while I get ready for work."

"Okay, sounds good." He said kissing her head.

After they were both dressed and ready, they had their coffee and headed to work. Tony headed straight to his desk and Ziva went down to help Abby.

"Good morning Abby." Ziva called out.

"Hi, how are you?"

"I'm alright I guess."

Abby looked at her. "Something's wrong. Tell me. Did something happen with Tony that you're not telling me."

Ziva furrowed her brow. "Well, in a matter of speaking I guess you could say that. We had sex, but it was kind of like sorry sex."

"Ziva, why did you and Tony have I'm sorry sex. That means you were on the verge of breaking up. What is going on with you two? Actually, what is going on with you and Gibbs?" Abby asked pulling her down on the couch beside her.

She sighed. "I need to tell you something Abby, but it would really help if McGee was here."

"Why does Tim need to be here?"

"Because, he should hear all that I'm about to say. I don't want to say it all again and believe me you won't want to hear it twice."

"Oh God, you're a killer?"

"Abby!"

"Well, you're freaking me out here Ziva."

"Yes, Tony and I fought. It was over something that happened awhile ago. But, believe me when I say that I want McGee here when I tell you this. And, no I am not a killer Abby."

Abby really was scared. "You're not dying are you? Please say no, because I couldn't handle that Ziva."

Ziva shook her head no. That calmed Abby a bit and she dialed Tim's phone. "McGee."

"Tim, can you come to my lab?"

"What's up Abby?"

"Ziva needs to speak with us and it's really important. She said it would be okay with Gibbs."

"Alright, I'll be down in a minute." He said before hanging up.

"He'll be right down."

"Thank you Abby." Ziva was silent the rest of the time until McGee entered.

"What's going on. Tony and Gibbs have been acting weird all morning."

"That's my fault McGee, I'm sorry. I need to tell you and Abby something and it's going to be hard to hear."

McGee looked at her for a moment and then spoke. "Whatever it is Ziva, please just tell us."

Ziva took a deep breath just like she had with Tony. She looked around, almost as if she were looking for a quick exist. "When I came here, it was to find out what Ari was really up to. He was my half brother. I did not want to believe that he shot and killed Agent Todd, but all the evidence was there," She looked at them.

Abby looked as if she wanted to slap her and Tim just sat down on one of Abby's chairs.

"And...?" Abby asked.

"I shot and killed him in Gibbs' basement because he was going to kill him, kill Gibbs that is. I'm so sorry. I know what she meant to you. Both of you. I hope that you can find it in your hearts to forgive me."

Ziva couldn't help but walk out and into the elevator. She was so distraught after telling them that she couldn't even hit the power button. All she did was collapse to the floor and cry. She did not know her fate. Would she lose Abby and McGee as her friends? Only time would tell. The elevator doors rang open and in walked Abby and McGee.

"Ziva?" McGee spoke softly.

"Hmm?" She said.

"We're not going to leave you. And, actually, Abby has something to say."

Ziva looked up at her. Abby sat down beside her. "I think deep down, I knew. I'm not sure how, well I'm a scientist so I guess that's how but I guess I just did."

"Is that why you hated me when I came?"

"Well, Kate died and she was my best friend. But, yes I guess so."

"I'm sorry Abby. It took a lot to convince Gibbs to let me tell Tony and he didn't take it very well at first. That's why I was ready to come stay with you. But, then he said I would have to admit why and everything. McGee, I'm sorry too. I never meant to lie to either of you. I know Gibbs didn't either."

"We know Ziva. You know that we're here for you." McGee replied.

"Thank you, I appreciate that."

McGee helped Ziva and Abby up off the floor. "Everything will be okay Ziva. I know it will."

Abby gave her a hug as did McGee.

Ziva smiled and embraced their hugs.


	21. Chapter 21

**21**

* * *

Ziva knew things were going to be a bit strained between her, Abby and McGee even if they told her things would be okay. She could feel it deep down and it was written on their faces, especially that of Abby's. After leaving the lab, which Abby didn't know she did she called Dr. Cranston asking to meet.

"Are you okay Ziva?"

"Yes, I'm alright."

"Let's meet at Gibbs' house, he said we could use his place if we had to."

"Alright, I'll meet you there in ten minutes." Ziva said. "I'll let him know we're using his place."

"Sounds good, see you soon."

Ziva ended the call and found Gibbs.

"Everything okay?" He asked looking up at her.

"Yes and no. I'm headed to your place to meet with Dr. Cranston."

He nodded. "You call me after you're done with your appointment. I'm worried about you."

"Everything with Abby and Tim went okay, at least it seemed to go that way."

"I'll talk with them while you're gone to get a better idea and I'll let Tony know where you are."

She nodded as she went to walk towards the elevator. "Oh, he asked me to marry him. I said yes. I do love him Gibbs. I love him so much."

"I know Ziver and he loves you. We talked a little bit and I know that the fight you guys had really bothered him."

"Thank you Gibbs. I'll call you when I'm done."

* * *

Ziva made the drive over to Gibbs' house and pulled in behind Dr. Cranston and opened the door.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Ziva. I'm just in the kitchen getting some water for us."

Ziva sat down on the couch as Rachel joined her.

"Thank you for the water and for meeting with me on such short notice."

"You sounded distressed and had me worried. Not sure I want to tell Gibbs about that."

"He's worried, I think he already knows something's up. And, well this new leaf I'm trying to turn is not to hide anything right?"

Dr. Cranston nodded and looked at her. "What happened?"

"I told Tony about killing Ari and that led to telling Abby and McGee. Tony and I fought, he was angry and I really thought he was going to kick me out. I was more afraid of losing his love though, because he promised to always love me and he does."

"So, what everything is okay now?"

"Oddly enough yes. And, telling Abby and McGee well, it went too well. Abby said deep down she always knew. She said because she's a scientist. And, I can see that because well she's Abby. But, I expected her to be really angry with me."

"Ziva, maybe she was angry with you back then, if she did know. And, even if she really didn't and she really is just finding out for the first time, you weren't the only one involved. You pulled the trigger yes, but you had to, Ari was going to kill Gibbs. Abby is not going be angry at you for that."

"Yes, I guess so."

"As for McGee. He's not one to hold many grudges. Especially, when it comes to things like this."

"Thank you, I hope so."

"Now, what happened with you and Tony?"

"We ended up having make up sex and he proposed." Ziva replied with a laugh.

Dr. Cranston gave her a smile. "Congratulations."

Ziva smiled. "Thank you very much. I'm excited."

"You have something else on your mind?"

She nodded. "I wanted to bring up adopting a baby with Tony and since it takes time, I thought we should start the process now. I don't think I can get pregnant and even if we tried, I think it would take a really long time or not at all."

Dr. Cranston looked at her. "Yes, the process is long and if that's what you want then you should start it. But, make sure it's what you both want. And, approach the subject gently with Tony. He has to understand that you're the one that might not be able to have children."

"We've talked about it a little bit, but I will do that. And, I'm pretty sure he'll understand."

"Ziva, do you use protection when you, well you know."

"We haven't and I guess I've just gotten lucky or I can't get pregnant. I know that he's fine. Please don't tell him I told you all of this. We've only made love twice."

"Nothing wrong with that Ziva. You've just gotten together and you went through a lot."

"I know and he's been so wonderful with everything."

"He's a good man Ziva and he's your something permanent."

She smiled. "Yes, he is. Thank you again for meeting with me."

"You're welcome. If you need me, I'm around."

She nodded as she got up. "See you soon."

* * *

Ziva headed back to NCIS and called Gibbs on the way.

"How did it go?" He asked answering the phone.

"It went well. I feel better then I "did."

"Take some time for lunch. Tony's will meet you. He'll call you when we're done talking."

"What about Abby and McGee?"

"They're fine. You're family and they love you."

"Do you forgive me?"

"What?"

"I know you didn't want me telling anyone about what happened and I talked you into it."

"Ziver, I could have said no and easily tried to stop you from telling Tony, Abby and McGee but you would have told them anyways. You had every right to tell them. So, no I'm not mad at you."

She wiped away some fallen tears. Not able to answer him, all she could do was nod and he got worried."

"Ziva?"

"Yeah, I'm here."

"I mean it Ziver, we're okay. Everything will be okay."

"Thank you Gibbs. I'll see you later."

"Right, Tony is about to call you so make sure you hang up now." Gibbs said with a small laugh.

"Bye Gibbs." She said hanging up right away.

Her phone rang immediately again and she answered. "I love you Ziva David." His voice spoke through the phone.

"I love you Tony. Where are we meeting for lunch?"

"At home. I need to see you alone."

"Okay, I'll see you in five."

Ziva pulled up to what was now their place and entered the apartment. Tony was already inside. He put her up against the door and kissed her passionately. She slowly peeled off his suit jacket and loosened his tie. He picked her up and he nipped at neck as they went for the bedroom.

"I've been thinking about doing this to you all day."

She grinned. "We're supposed to be eating lunch."

"Well, you full fill my appetite Ms. David." He said as he took her pants off.

They made love, cleaned up and then headed back to work.

"That was a beautiful lunch Agent DiNozzo." She said kissing him before they got off the elevator.

He smiled. "We should do that more often."

She looked at him. "Can we talk about something tonight? It's pretty important."

"Of course. Is everything okay?"

"Yes, I mean I hope so."

He kissed her head. "I'll see you in a few hours."

* * *

Ziva went back down by Abby to help her. The guys got called out on a case so then she was able to help with the evidence. After talking awhile about everything that had gone on, Abby assured Ziva that they were okay.

"When will you be cleared for active duty?"

"Hopefully, by next week. I take my firearms test tomorrow. But, I've been practicing a lot."

Abby looked at her and smiled. "What did you do on your lunch?"

Ziva blushed. "Uh, met Tony."

Abby laughed. "Definitely, not for food."

"I feel like I'm having a clandestine affair or something."

"Which is really hot when Tony is involved."

"He relaxes me. But, yes when we make love it is amazing."

"I can tell you have other things on your mind. You know if you ever want to talk about those things, I'm here."

"I'm going to talk to Tony tonight about adoption. You know that we don't use or haven't used protection when we make love and either I've been lucky not to get pregnant or I can't. I really want a child of my own with him but, I want to see if he has any interest in adoption or if he still wants kids at all."

Abby squeezed her hand. "I know he does. And, whether it be naturally or adoption, I can't see that mattering to him. He loves you."

"I know. Thank you Abby. I'm still dealing with trusting myself and learning to believe that Tony might just be okay with things."

* * *

The rest of the day went by pretty quickly and Ziva went up to the bullpen and met Tony. They left around six and stopped to get groceries on the way home. She put them away when they got in and Tony changed and then she did. After making something to eat they sat on the couch to talk.

"So, what's going on? You're not breaking up with me are you?" Tony said joking.

"No, of course not. I wanted to talk to you about starting adoption proceedings. Or, looking into it."

Tony turned all the way around to look at her. "Oh..."


	22. Chapter 22

**22**

**A/N: **I'm off work today due to the holiday, that's why you're getting all the updates. So, possibly nothing more until mid to late week.

* * *

"Tony, do you still want children?" Ziva questioned.

"Very much. But, isn't it a little soon to start looking into adoption?"

She put her head down and shook it. "I went to the doctor recently, what she said wasn't what I wanted to hear. I think that's part of why I told you about the Ari thing too."

"Oh, Zi, I'm so sorry that I've been totally clueless. I should have known. What did she say?"

"That pregnancy would be a long road. I mean we could try, but it would be months and months of trying. And, more than likely shots."

Fear was written across his face. "Does sex bother you? Or, I mean hurt you?"

"No, making love is wonderful Tony. You are so gentle and wonderful and I can't imagine a more beautiful thing with the man I love."

"You would tell me if I was hurting you, right?"

"I would, but I promise you're not."

"Well, let's find ourselves an adoption attorney and start the process. Now, Zi, you know that we might not be able to get a baby right?"

"Yes, I'm aware of that. I know they're going to find out about my past. Especially, with my mental health."

His eyes went wide. "Ziva, that wasn't your fault. You came back from Somalia with PTSD. They can't not give us a child because of that."

She nodded and gave him a small smile. "We're going to need letters from different people saying that we'd make good parents. I've thought of a few already, once we get to that point."

"We'll be fine when it comes to that part. I'm sorry that you had to go through that appointment alone."

"I think it's better that I did. I wouldn't want you to have to bear hearing everything that the doctor told me."

"Ziva, now that we're going to be married, I hope that you will share with me what the doctor tells you. Will you?"

"Yes, now I will. I promise."

"So, we have a wedding and an adoption to plan."

"A small wedding. Just our close friends."

"That sounds very nice."

"Are you going to ask Abby to be your maid of honor?"

"I am and will you ask Tim to be your best man?"

"Yeah, he'd make a damn fine one. He sure has been a great friend to me and I haven't always shown him that."

"Well, now we can show them. And, if Gibbs will accept I'm going to ask him to walk me down the aisle."

"We can talk about dates and maybe even start looking at places this weekend. I think the sooner the better. That way the adoption process would go better, easier, faster."

Ziva nodded. "I agree. Well, let's see. How about next month. It's January now. Let's just go for February 9th. There's no significance and it's before Valentine's Day."

"I like it. We can start checking some places out this weekend. And, we'll have the ceremony and reception right there."

She put her head against his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around her. "Gibbs, will help us with the adoption if he has too. He knows how much we want children." Tony said quietly into her ear."

"I love you Tony. You will make a great father."

He kissed her, it lingering for awhile. "And, you will make an amazing mother."

They just laid there for awhile and she just played with his shirt. She moved her other hand onto his stomach where she slowly started to go up it.

"You're thinking about something."

Ziva laughed. "Yes, about you naked in bed next to me."

"No, you have something on your mind beautiful. But, yes I know you want that too."

"Actually, for once Tony, I'm finally happy. I talked with Dr. Cranston today and things went really well. Abby, McGee and I are okay and I'm getting married and am talking about adopting a child with the man I love," She looked up at him and smiled genuinely. "I never thought I'd be able to say that. But, you've made me so happy and that's one of the many reasons I love you."

All he could do was kiss her. She loved the feel of his lips on hers.

"Let's go to bed Ziva."

She got up and took his hand and off they went.

**A/N:** So, the next chapter I will be moving ahead in the story. The adoption proceedings will be a little further and wedding plans will have been made official.


	23. Chapter 23

**23**

* * *

Tony and Ziva with the help of Gibbs had hired an attorney a man by the name of Christan Tillman to help them with their adoption proceedings. They had found out that a local teenage girl was giving up her baby and had wanted to meet with them.

"You mean we could actually get a baby?" Ziva asked their lawyer.

"Yes, this young lady chose you from a bunch of profiles she went through." He replied, smiling at the couple.

"When do we meet with her?" Tony asked as he held Ziva's hand.

"In a little while. She'll be here shortly."

Ziva looked at Tony nervously. "Oh, Tony, I hope she likes us."

"Even if she doesn't baby, someone will. Don't you worry."

The young woman walked in the office a few minutes later. She was about 5'8 with long dark brown hair and brown eyes. She was already around six months pregnant.

"Tony, Ziva, this is Arianna Moore." Their lawyer said introducing them.

"Hi, Arianna, it's very nice to meet you." Ziva said standing and putting out her hand.

Tony did the same.

"It's nice to meet you both as well."

Arianna asked them several questions which had all been no and then some that had been yes. One of them was they were planning to move in the next month and they loved dogs and would plan on having one in the future as well as the house they moved into would have a big yard with a swing set.

"Any siblings in the future?"

Ziva was hesitant at first, but then answered. "Yes, I think definitely so."

Arianna smiled. "Good, I would like him to have someone to play with at home."

Tony looked at her for a moment and then spoke. "You're having a boy then?"

"I am. It's been checked out a few times."

"Do you have a name picked out?" Ziva asked.

Arianna shook her head. "No, that's for the adoptive parents to decide. I just have one request of them."

"What is that?" Tony asked.

"I would like a picture each year on his birthday or maybe not every year but maybe milestones like first year and then maybe 3rd year and 5th or something like that."

"We can definitely do that for you Arianna. We'd be more than happy to do that. If you were to chose us, I want you to know that we would take such wonderful care of him. He would have so much love."

Arianna smiled at Ziva. And, she smiled back. She wasn't sure what she thought of her or Tony along with some of the questions they answered 'no' to.

"I have no doubt that my son will be raised with love. And, even though there are no biological aunts or uncles or grandparents I've heard nothing but the best of all of these other family members that you've mentioned."

Tony's eyes went wide. "So, you want us to adopt your son, to raise him as our own?"

"Yes, I want you to raise him. After, I give birth in a few months, he will be yours."

Ziva took Tony's hand and squeezed it. "Thank you so much." Ziva said giving her a hug.

"No, thank you." Arianna said back.

The meeting ended and they exchanged phone numbers. They would converse once a week now or more until the baby was born. Arianna even invited Ziva to her next ultrasound appointment. Tony understood it was just a woman thing and respected Arianna's privacy. Ziva was very proud of him for that. He was also busy planning the rest of their wedding which would be happening in the next two weeks.

* * *

Tony pulled out his phone and showed them to Gibbs. "Here's the latest pictures of our son." Tony said with a dotting smile.

Gibbs couldn't help but smile himself. "I'm so happy for you."

"Thank you boss. You helped make this happen, not sure I've seen Ziva so happy."

"You'll see it when you get married and then when you bring your son home from the hospital."

Tony grinned. "I know," He looked at Gibbs for a moment. "Hey, boss. Hypothetical here, but if Ziva were to get pregnant by chance they couldn't take him away from us could they?"

"Are you trying to have a baby Tony? And, no I don't see any legal bases for that. I mean you're adopting a child out of love and your reason wasn't because you couldn't have children it was just because you wanted to."

Tony nodded. "To answer your question, yes I guess we're always trying. But, it's difficult for her. I know that Arianna has time to change her mind and could take her son back. I think it's up to six months.

"Don't worry Tony, you'll have your son for a very long time." Gibbs assured him.

"I know. I guess I'm worried about assuring Ziva."

"Just worry about getting married in two weeks. I think you're both nervous enough as it is with everything that's going on."

Tony nodded as he sipped his beer and ate his steak.

**A/N: **Sorry for the delay!


	24. Chapter 24

**24**

**A/N: **Writer's block and other things have been keeping me from writing. I hope you're all okay with this. Skipping ahead to the wedding!

* * *

It was the day before the wedding and Tony and Ziva had off because they had things to finish up.

"Are you staying with Abby tonight?"

"Yes, and staying here with McGee?"

Tony laughed. "Yes, that is correct."

"I'm going to miss you."

"And, I you. But, after tomorrow we'll never be apart again."

Ziva smiled and kissed him. "Thank you Tony. I love you, so much."

"I love you too." He said kissing her back.

* * *

After Abby finished work that night, she came to pick up Ziva. They would ride to the chapel together in the morning. McGee came over after he finished his paperwork and put down two twelve packs of beer in front of Tony.

"Rough day McGoo?"

"Yeah, I had to do all of yours and Ziva's paperwork and Gibbs was grumbling a lot."

"Sorry, he doesn't mean it. I promise you."

"Well, let's relax a bit than and have a beer." Tim said with a grin and handed him a beer.

Tony opened his beer and one for Tim. He clinked his bottle against McGee's. "Thank you Tim."

"Congratulation's Tony."

* * *

Morning came and Tony got up and put on some coffee. McGee woke up a short time later.

"Hey, how are you feeling after all those beers?" McGee asked rubbing his head.

"Hungover, I'm making us coffee so that I can get married somewhat sober."

McGee laughed. "Yes, I'm feeling the same way. I'm going to go shower. Then I'm going to call Abby and make sure the girls are up."

"Good idea. I'll get ready after you're done."

He nodded and grabbed his stuff heading into the bathroom.

Tony poured himself a cup of coffee when the phone rang.

"Ah, geez why is the phone ringing so damn loud? Yeah, hello?"

"What's up with you DiNozzo?"

"Oh, hi boss."

"You're hungover!"

"Had a few beers with my best man, you have a rule against that now?"

"No, but you shouldn't get plastered the night before you're wedding. Well, you can but you might regret it the next day."

"Yeah, I am. My head hurts, but I'll deal. I'm going to marry the woman that I love to today. I'll be just fine."

"McGee?"

"In the shower, he's fine. We'll see you at the chapel. He's calling the girl's when he gets out."

Gibbs smiled. "Okay, see you soon."

"Thank you, bye."

"Bye."

McGee came down just as Tony hung up with Gibbs. "Who were you talking with?"

"Boss man. I told him we would see him later."

"Good. I'm going to call Abby and Ziva and make sure they're up."

Tony grabbed his coffee. "I'll be out soon. Tell Ziva I'll see her in a couple of hours and that I love her."

He got ready and McGee called and the girls had been up for hours getting ready themselves. In fact, Abby told McGee that Ziva was nervous and was a bit emotional.

"Don't tell Tony."

"I won't. But, is she okay?"

"Yeah, she's good. How's Tony?"

"He's good. I think he's a tad nervous himself."

"Oh, boy. Well, hopefully they'll both be okay by the time the wedding comes around."

"I think everything will be just fine. We got Gibbs."

"True. And, I keep reminding Ziva that Tony loves her more than anything and that its truer than true."

McGee smiled. "Only you would quote Dr. Suess."

She laughed. "I know. It did make her feel better though."

"Good. Well, I love you Abby and I'll see you soon."

"Love you too and don't be late."

"We won't."

He hung up and went to check on Tony.

"McGoo, my tie won't tie right."

He snorted and helped Tony tie his tux tie. "There, hows that?"

"Looks good. Thank you."

"I should get dressed I guess, hmm?"

Tony looked at him. "You alright?"

"Yeah, couldn't be better." McGee replied smiling.

"Okay, just wanted to make sure."

McGee went and got dressed and before they knew it, it was time to head to the chapel.

* * *

Abby did Ziva's hair in a long french princess french braid. And, then along the side was baby's breath. Abby's hair was pinned up and she too had some baby's breath to match.

"Time to put on your dress Ziva." Abby said and she held it up.

Ziva looked at it and couldn't help but cry.

"Don't cry, because if you do then I will."

The dress was a beautiful strapless white gown with a long train and Abby's dress was black. But, Ziva didn't mind because the men were wearing black anyways. Gibbs, Ducky, Jimmy, McGee would all be in black as well and Breena was wearing a black dress too. Abby's dress reminded Ziva of something that Julia Roberts would have worn in Pretty Woman.

"I love your dress. It's gorgeous." Ziva said.

"Thank you. McGee bought it for me. He has great taste, doesn't he?"

"He sure does."

"So, are you ready to get married?"

"I am. Let's go."

* * *

Tim and Tony were all set and now Ziva just had to take her spot behind Abby with Gibbs.

Gibbs looked at Ziva in her wedding dress and smiled at her. She smiled back. "Thank you Gibbs." She said, her voice getting choked up.

"You look beautiful Ziva. I'm so happy for you and Tony and I've never been so proud of you. I hope you know how much I love you." His own voice breaking.

She nodded. "I do and I love you too Gibbs."

"Let's go get you married."

Ziva took his arm and he wrapped it around his. They started walking down the aisle as the music played. As, they met Tony he took her hands and joined their hands together. The minister then began to speak.

"We are gathered here today, to join Ziva and Anthony in holy matrimony. They have written their own vows, which they will say now."

"Tony, when I met you I never imagined that we would get married. But, we became best friends and it grew from there. You saved me in more ways than one. I never would have gotten through everything that happened without you. I love you so much and I will love you forever, through good times and bad."

"Ziva, I guess I never imagined that we would get married either but I think I've always loved you. You've been my best friend for a very long time and you always will be. You've helped me through things, difficult things and I'm not sure where I'd be without you. I love you so much and I will love you through good times and bad, now and forever."

Abby and McGee handed over the rings so Ziva and Tony could place them on each others fingers.

"Take this ring as a sign of my love for you." Ziva said placing her ring on Tony's finger.

"Take this ring as a symbol of my love and fidelity." Tony said placing it on her finger.

The minister smiled. "You may kiss your bride."

Tony leaned in and kissed her madly. After a moment Gibbs slapped him and he stopped.

"Sorry boss."

"May, I now pronounce Mr. and Mrs. Anthony DiNozzo." The minister announced happily.

Tony and Ziva turned around and walked down the aisle now as a married couple.

**A/N: I tried to do you guys justice.**


	25. Chapter 25

**25**

**A/N: **After much delay here is the next chapter. I am skipping ahead a bit.

* * *

The next several weeks had passed by so fast. Abby, Ziva and Breena had put together a beautiful nursery for her yet to be named son. They all stood back and looked at it.

"Oh, my gosh Ziva your son is going to have the best looking nursery." Breena said grinning.

"I know. We have a beautiful boy coming anytime now and I'm officially pregnant." Ziva said smiling.

Abby smiled. "Your son is going to have a new brother or sister, just like that."

"Tony wants a girl." Ziva said putting her hand over her stomach.

"That's so sweet." Breena said. "Daddy's little girl."

"Oh, I'm sure she would be too." Abby said.

"Well, I'm only about ten weeks so they'll be able to tell me what we're having maybe in as little fifteen weeks but more about seventeen weeks."

Just then Abby's phone rang.

"Hi Gibbs, what's up?"

"Arianna has gone into labor and for some reason couldn't get a hold of Tony or Ziva. Do you know where they are?"

"Yes, I'm with Ziva now. I'll take her to the hospital and Tony is with McGee. I'll get in touch with them."

"Good, I'll meet you there."Gibbs said.

Ziva looked at Abby. She had taken the phone of the hook and left her cell downstairs.

Abby hung up. "Arianna just went into labor. You're about to become a mother. Let's get to the hospital."

"God, Abby. I took my phone of the hook. She's been trying to get in touch with me, with us!"

"Why did you take the phone of the hook Ziva?"

"Tony and I had a fight this morning that I never told you about. Let's not talk about it now. I'm pregnant and we're about to become parents right?"

"Is he mad that you're pregnant?"

"No, he wants a girl remember?"

"Ziva..."

She sighed. "Yes, a bit. He thinks it hurts our chances of holding on to our son. He thinks that Arianna will take her son back if she finds out I'm pregnant. The truth is, I didn't know that I could get pregnant. And, my doctor says I have to be careful while I am. Hopefully, he'll want his child should I carry it to term."

"Ziva, I have no doubt that he will want a child that the two of you made together. I'm sure, no, I know that he did not mean what he said. And, if he did I will slap him upside his head."

Ziva gave her a small smile. "That's not necessary Abby, but thank you."

She smiled. "You ready to go meet your son?"

"I am."

They arrived at the hospital where they were met by McGee and Tony.

Tony looked at Ziva and took her hand. "I love you Ziva. I'm sorry that I hurt you."

"Do you want our baby?"

Tony's eyes went wide. "What? Yes, of course I want our baby. I shouldn't have said what I did. I guess We are just being blessed twice. How many can say that like this?"

Ziva nodded and rubbed her stomach. "Let's go wait to hear about Arianna shall we?"

Tony nodded. He had let her down and she was still upset.

"I love you too Tony."

They sat in some chairs and waited for about forty five minutes before a nurse came out to get them.

"Mr and Mrs. DiNozzo?"

"Yes?" Ziva replied.

"Arianna is asking for both of you."

Tony and Ziva followed the nurse to Arianna's room. There they saw her holding a small bundle in a blue blanket with a blue hat on. Arianna smiled.

"He's a big boy. Came out at 9 lbs 14oz 22 inches long. And, he has dark brown hair like I did when I was born."

Tony couldn't help but just look at him. He was overcome with such joy that his tears just came. "He's beautiful Arianna." Tony spoke.

"He's yours now. Your son and you must give him a name."

He smiled as she handed over the baby to him. "Yes, Ziva and I have a few in mind but we hadn't chosen a final one."

"I have an idea." Ziva said. "How about Anthony Jethro DiNozzo and we'll call him AJ for short?"

"You really want another Tony?" He asked looking at her.

"Yes, I do. He's named after you and his grandfather. The two people I love most in this world. Besides, he's not Anthony the III he's an AJ and we won't call him Junior." Ziva said with a smirk.

Tony leaned in and kissed Ziva. "I love you and I love our baby so much. You have no idea."

"Oh, believe me, I have some." She said kissing him back.

Arianna smiled at the exchange between the couple and the newborn child. While, she had just given birth and it should be hard for her it was somewhat a relief. She knew that it might not last long and that she would at some point miss her child. She might even want him back, but she couldn't do that to Tony and Ziva.

* * *

Christian Tillman came by several hours later with the papers for Tony and Ziva to sign. The adoption papers would be made official once they signed them. Well, actually it would still be several months but Arianna had already signed them.

"So, this is it? All we have to do is sign them and AJ is ours?" Ziva asked.

"Yes, you can take him home tomorrow." Tillman replied.

Ziva looked at him. "Will my pregnancy hurt matters? I mean, can AJ be taken from us?"

"No, I don't see how that's relevant Ziva. Just because you got pregnant while you were in the midst of an adoption. It has happened before to couples. Was this a surprise?"

Ziva nodded. "Yes, very much so. I...we didn't think I could get pregnant let alone stay. I mean if I make it through it would be a wonderful thing."

"I wouldn't worry about it. If something does happen and Arianna would fight for AJ back because of you being pregnant...don't you worry. I would help you fight it back."

"Thank you, let's just hope nothing like that does happen. We've had a good relationship with her."

He nodded. "I know." He replied filling the papers away in his briefcase.

Ziva went back out by Tony who was starring at their son through the nursery window. "We can take him home tomorrow."

"Hmm, oh that's wonderful. "What took so long, are you okay?"

"Yes, I just had some questions is all."

"Ziva, I hope you didn't..."

She sighed. "I'm sorry Tony, but I had too."

"I don't want you getting all angsty over this whole thing and the doctor said your anxiety level has to be kept low. Thinking that you'll lose AJ is NOT going to help matters. I will fight to the moon and back that we not lose him just because you're pregnant. But, if she wants him back right now then she can take him."

"No, he's ours now."

"I know Ziva, but it's better to take him now then several months after the fact."

She nodded. "Yes, I suppose you're right. I just don't want to lose him at all."

"Then let's not. Let's make sure we don't."

**A/N: **Let me know what you think. I might put up another.


	26. Chapter 26

**26**

**A/N: **Thank you to those that reviewed and to my new alerts. This chapter is not for the faint of heart...meaning it's rather M. Or, as M as I've gotten in awhile.

* * *

AJ was now in his new home with his parents Anthony and Ziva DiNozzo. They had agreed to send pictures once in awhile to Arianna, but other than that no contact would be made until he was of age. They had agreed to tell him that he was adopted once he was older. But, he was their son and Arianna could see the love that just poured out of them.

Tony walked into the nursery and found Ziva feeding AJ. "You look so natural doing that."

She smiled at him. "He keeps trying to go for my boob." She says with a chuckle. "What am I going to do if I should decide to breastfeed our child?"

"Then you do just that. I can feed AJ." Tony sat on the floor and looked up at her. "Ziva, you're having our baby and you have the right to choose how to feed him or her."

"Two infants under the age of one, are you going to be ready for that?"

Tony took AJ and placed him in his rolling bassinet. "I'm ready for anything. I love you Ziva DiNozzo and I love our son and I can't wait to meet our baby that we created."

She pulled Tony down into her lap and kissed him. "I'll never stop loving you. Thank you for my babies."

"Thank you Ziva." He said as he picked her up and carried her into the bedroom.

"You have to get AJ first." She said.

Tony went and rolled AJ beside them and proceeded to undress his wife. He shed her of the clothes she was wearing and started kissing her down her neck. She let out a moan of delight as he moved his way down. He stopped at her breasts and took his time.

"Oh, Tonnny!" She said as he moved even lower.

He nibbled lightly on her stomach and kissed it. He caressed her baby bump and talked softly to it for a moment and continued his way down. Ziva began to arch her back as Tony got to her sensitive area and gave her the ride of a lifetime.

Ziva was about to scream when Tony kissed her hard and deep. She looked up at him. "We don't want AJ awake before its time." He said grinning at her.

She was breathing hard as she was still coming down from her high. "I must give you payback my dear. But, I needed that."

"I know, you were all stressed out. They say that sex is a wonderful stress reliever." Tony replied as he pulled Ziva on top of him.

"Oh, it is." She said as she started kissing his torso and moving slowly down.

She could feel his heart beat faster, along with his breathing. "Ziiiva stop teasing."

She laughed. "Oh, no I love to tease you." She said as she hummed the song '_These are a few of my favorite things_.'

He was just about to scream out her name when she placed her hand over his mouth. "No baby, we have a sleeping one remember?"

Just then he took her and rolled her over again and he entered her very slowly and then fast and just then his orgasm shook inside of her. It had been a long time since they had made love like that. Even, when they conceived their baby it was nothing like what had just happened. In fact the last time they had done something like this was before they were married and thinks were still kind of rocky.

They finally both came down from their high and Tony held Ziva in his arms. She looked up at him with tears in her eyes.

"Thank you Tony, for loving me."

"I've always loved you and always will."

**A/N: **So, short chapter for now. Another chapter coming. Hope you liked this. I'm thinking of stopping here and putting up a new story (continuing). What do you think? Somalia is kind of over so maybe Nightmares of Past and Present? She could have new ones but not of Somalia. I don't know. I would like some feedback.


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